Category: Pussy Posse

Open Post: Hosted By Karl Lagerfeld’s Cat, Choupette, Posing In Vogue With Naomi Campbell

April 12, 2023 / Posted by:

If you’ve recently caught whiffs of singed weave and burnt silicone and heard a thunderous, demonic voice groaning in anguish, it’s because Kris Jenner–whose kash kows probably weren’t included on the Met Gala guest list this year–just learned that the late Karl Lagerfeld’s beloved cat, Choupette Lagerfeld, did score an invite! The 12-year-old blue-cream tortie Birman breed cat is living her best life in the spotlight lately because the Met’s theme this year is “Karl Lagerfeld: A Line Of Beauty.” The pricey pussy was also photographed with Naomi Cambell for a Kunty Karl tribute section in Vogue!

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Today In Well, She Is 25: There’s A Rumor That Leonardo DiCaprio And Camila Morrone Have Broken Up

August 30, 2022 / Posted by:

UPDATE: People’s sources upgraded this rumor to “true” and say that Leonardo and Camila are over after 4 years.

The world held its collective breath when Camila Morrone, Leonardo DiCaprio’s girlfriend of several years, turned 25 on June 16. Some resumed breathing when nothing happened and the two celebrated the 4th of July together as 25-year-old and 47-year-old romantic partners. However, according to Deuxmoi, the time has come when he must fire up the yacht and perform the sacred ritual that only happens every four to eight years. Legend is, Leo sails to what he calls the Cove of Closure, located somewhere in the Italian Riviera (only Leo and his little buddy Lukas Haas know the exact location) to burn a ceremonial Victoria’s Secret bra and panny set (he’s got a whole steamer trunk full of them just for this purpose), sending its ashes into the sea while Lukas dutifully scampers off to lower the Pussy Posse flag to half-mast before scuttling over to ring the bespoke PP gong with a silly oversized dildo (Tobey Maguire got it as a gag gift for Leo’s 40th), signaling that yet another of Leo’s girlfriends has aged out of service. It’s a solemn ritual, but an important one that keeps Leo grounded. Because each peal of the gong symbolizes that another Angel has been sent off to heaven/date Sean Penn. Let us bow our heads. #PussyPosse4Lyfe

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Tobey Maguire “Couldn’t Land A Girl” While Partying With Leonardo DiCaprio

February 14, 2022 / Posted by:

Sorry, “For salebaby shoesnever worn.” There’s a new contender for the saddest sentence ever written: Tobey Maguire “couldn’t land a girl” while partying with Leonardo DiCaprio. Wow. Is this real life? According to Page Six, it is. Their source claims that Tobey, 46, and Leo, 47, were hanging in the VIP section of the nightclub MainRō in Hollywood on Thursday night, and Leo introduced Tobey to “three different blondes.” But he struck out with all of them. Oh God… what’s next? Brunettes?!

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“Entourage” Actor Kevin Connolly Has Been Accused Of Sexual Assault

July 16, 2020 / Posted by:

Time to circle the yachts, a member of the Pussy Posse has been accused of sexual assault. The Daily Beast has published an accusation of sexual assault against Kevin Connolly by a former costume designer named Gracie Cox. Gracie claims Kevin assaulted her at a 2005 wrap party for Kevin’s directorial debut The Gardener of Eden which starred fellow posse-mate Lukas Haas and was produced by Leonardo DiCaprio. Kevin may not have any lips to speak of, but he made the most with what he’s got to speak a denial. Kevin claims the encounter was consensual.

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Open Post: Hosted By The News Of Lil Bub’s Remains Possibly Going Into Space

December 4, 2019 / Posted by:

Internet superstar pussy Lil Bub passed away in her sleep earlier this week. She was 8 years old. Well, even though Lil Bub’s gone, she will not be forgotten, as her caretaker, Mike Bridavsky, has a posthumous plan for Bub. TMZ says that Lil Bub may truly live up among the heavens forever, as her owner is thinking of blasting her remains into space.

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Jake Gyllenhaal Is Dating a 22-Year-Old Model

December 22, 2018 / Posted by:

I thought that the Pussy Posse was a closed, Founding Members only type of club, but it looks like they are seeking new members. The good news for Jake Gyllenhaal is that his temporary card has arrived just in time for Christmas! Jake has finally met the final – most important- criteria in securing his place on next year’s Ibiza PP yacht trip. It’s been reported that 38-year-old Jake has been dating 22-year-old model Jeanne Cadieu since June. Slow claps from the Poop Deck from Leo DiCaprio and his main-man boo Lukas Haas, as Jake wipes a tear from his eye and slowly steps aboard the S.S. Under 25-Year-Old Chicks Only. Today is a beautiful day for the May-December romance.

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