It’s OSCUH Day!! Who is going to be crowned prom king and queen of Hollywood? We only have a scant few hours to find out. In the meantime, the Academy Awards’ ugly sister the Razzies has already taken place, so we finally know who got the pig’s blood dropped on them. And the winner is…Blonde! I wonder if Ana de Armas and the film crew told Marilyn Monroe’s grave that they were getting her blessing for making the worst film of 2022.
Kim Kardashian Says That She Had To Beg Ripley’s To Allow Her To Wear “THE Dress” To The Met Gala After They Changed Their Mind
When Kim Kardashian isn’t summoning the apocalypse by dining with fellow she-devils, she’s using her paid-for pork piles to defile garments of immense historical value despite no one thinking it should’ve happened. And on the latest episode of Hulu’s The Kardashians, Kim revealed that Ripley’s Believe It or Not had a brief moment of clarity and actually did try to pull the plug on the whole plan since Kim couldn’t yank Marilyn Monroe’s delicate president-pilfering dress up over her detachable ass; but Kim, ever the hustler, stopped eating and got on her knees to beg them to reconsider. and the rest is history (to Kim only). So, we can all blame Ripley’s being soft for all of us STILL having to hear about her 2022 Met Gala lewk half a year later. It’s not like Kim has any other high drama currently going on or anything.
Even though Tom Hanks started the pandemic, I don’t think there’s an actor in Hollywood whose career has been more affected by it than Ana De Armas. Just as she was about to soar to new heights like a phoenix rising from the ashes of Ben Affleck’s back, lofted up, up, up to the stars by Daniel Craig’s propulsive Knives Out Foghorn Leghorn accent, the entire industry fell out of the sky and landed squarely on Daniel’s Peppa Pig No Time To Die accent, which was supposed to be Ana’s next big break, delaying that film’s release two entire years. Then came the snails *shiver*. Now, as if two cursed projects weren’t enough, in walks Blonde to a chorus of “BUT WHY?”s, and I’m not just talking about the talking fetus that gave Netflix the vapors. Well, unfortunately for Ana, her Blonde director Andrew Dominik answered that question in an interview with the British Film Institute in which he reduces Marilyn and Jane Russell in Gentlemen Prefer Blondes to “well-dressed whores.” Ana, I know you believe in ghosts so believe me when I tell you— Ana you in danger, girl!
Ana de Armas And The “Blonde” Crew Visited Marilyn Monroe’s Grave To Ask Permission To Film The Movie
Is Oscar season in September? Because Ana de Armas seems to be really buckling the fuck in and has chosen the ghost narrative pretty hard. She previously spoke about how she felt Marilyn Monroe‘s spirit was with her during the filming of her new film Blonde out in select theatres now and out next week on Netflix. But now Ana says that she also visited Marilyn’s grave to ask for permission. For someone who claims to hate attention, Ana is saying some questionable things.
The fictionalized Marilyn Monroe biopic, Blonde, has been a topic of discussion for some time. The film, based on the novel Blonde by Joyce Carol Oates, has got tons of press for being reportedly too nasty and crazy for the people at Netflix. The film is rated NC-17, which means that there might be a visible nut-shot in it because that’s what level that is, and even the book it’s based on has been accused of gratuitously capitalizing on a woman’s tragic life by creating a fictional biography of her that includes rape. But the reviews are in, and after its screening at the Venice Film Festival, Ana de Armas is being praised for her performance as a fictional Marilyn, one person calling it “uncanny.” Which I’m assuming actually means “uncanny, except for the accent.“ But we have Marilyn herself to thank for this tour-de-force because according to Ana, her spirit was with her during filming. Wow, these ghosts don’t have anything else to do except hang out with actresses?
It feels like we’ve been threatened with the release of Blonde starring Ana de Armas as Marilyn Monroe (seen above giving me more “Brittany Murphy as Judy Greer’s character in Jawbreaker” than Marilyn) for eons, but maybe I’m just confusing it with all the other 5 million Marilyn Monroe projects that are keeping Marilyn’s memory alive Marilyn from fucking resting already. But Blonde is finally landing on Netflix on September 28, whether we like it or not, and when the first full trailer was released last week, talk went from “WHY DOES THIS EXIST?!” to debate over Ana’s Cuban accent mixing in with her breathy Marilyn voice. The owners of The Marilyn Monroe Estate have taken a side and they have defended Ana’s performance in the trailer, accent and all. But then again, the Estate also defended Kim Kardashian after her nuclear power plant ass destroyed Marilyn’s dress!!!!