Kim Kardashian Says That She Had To Beg Ripley’s To Allow Her To Wear “THE Dress” To The Met Gala After They Changed Their Mind
When Kim Kardashian isn’t summoning the apocalypse by dining with fellow she-devils, she’s using her paid-for pork piles to defile garments of immense historical value despite no one thinking it should’ve happened. And on the latest episode of Hulu’s The Kardashians, Kim revealed that Ripley’s Believe It or Not had a brief moment of clarity and actually did try to pull the plug on the whole plan since Kim couldn’t yank Marilyn Monroe’s delicate president-pilfering dress up over her detachable ass; but Kim, ever the hustler, stopped eating and got on her knees to beg them to reconsider. and the rest is history (to Kim only). So, we can all blame Ripley’s being soft for all of us STILL having to hear about her 2022 Met Gala lewk half a year later. It’s not like Kim has any other high drama currently going on or anything.
The last episode of The Kardashians seemed to focus on Kim’s “style,” because she also spat at people dragging her Fashion Nova Guy Fieri look by saying that it was Kanye West who styled her:
But Kanye isn’t to blame for the Happy Birthday Mr. President dress messiness. Us Weekly says that in a confessional scene, Kim recounted the harrowing tale of the time that she almost didn’t get to wear a dress that would later go on to become her entire personality.
“They just pulled the whole thing from me, so I am fuming. I tried the prototype first to see if that fit. Once it fit, they sent the original,” Kim, 42, explained in a confessional during a new episode of Hulu’s The Kardashians, which premiered on Thursday, November 3. “When I went to put it on, it wouldn’t even go up over my hips. I was devastated.”
“I was so prepared to go in my head that it is going to make me so upset to not,” she told Khloé Kardashian and Kourtney Kardashian about her efforts behind-the-scenes.
And you wouldn’t want to see Kim upset, she might actually have to change the inflection of her vocal-fried voice. Poor Kim—who only has limited access to money, stylists, and options—had no Met Gala backup plan. If she couldn’t use her sweaty ass to leave her mark on the synthetic fabric of American history, she would stay home; so she wrote Ripley’s a strongly worded email.
“I wrote [Ripley’s Believe It or Not] a groveling begging email so they were very firm. They were like, ‘We can’t get the insurance,’ so I said we would get it. I have an answer for everything and they are just like no.”
And as we’ve all been made aware several times now, Kim went on a restrictive diet for three weeks to be able to (kind of) shimmy all of the way into the dress but ultimately end up having to cover the struggling back closure with a fur stole. Many pics of her were snapped that night looking as though she’s slurping up an invisible spaghetti noodle (as seen above), since she was probably desperately feenin’ for carbs as she attempted to Christian Bale–it her way into stretched-textile infamy.
After people raised concerns about her weight loss, Kim made it clear she stood by her decision. “To me it was like, ‘OK, Christian Bale can do it for a movie role and that is acceptable.’ Even Renée Zellweger gained weight for a role. It’s all the same to me,” she said during an interview with The New York Times in June. “I wasn’t saying, ‘Hey everyone, why don’t you go lose this weight in a short period of time?’”
Such a serious artiste. And Kim even had her now-ex Pete Davidson transform into her perfect JFK…by having him toss on a skinny tie and stand awkwardly in the shadow of her massive self-admiration on the red carpet.
Kim discussed having then-boyfriend Pete Davidson match her outfit, adding, “And Pete will come with me. If Pete wears a suit and a skinny tie, he is my full JFK.”
If by “full JFK” she meant “full Janky Fuckin Klown,” then I guess I can get behind that. But with the way Kim’s still venerating herself for wearing this dress, she better get started plotting for next year’s gala if she plans to outdo herself. It seems like she might’ve already tossed us a hint that she’s fixing to wear Kris Jenner’s bones, so if the theme for 2023 was “Caveman Chic,” she’d be set. But since we know the theme is some Karl Lagerfeld bullshit, pace yourselves for Kimmy in a powdered wig with a matching powdered merkin.