Back in 2021, Dakota Johnson did an interview and graciously shared with us her opinion on “cancel culture.” 33-year-old Dakota admitted that she felt bad for former controversial co-stars like Johnny Depp (Black Mass), Shia LaBeouf (The Peanut Butter Falcon), and Armie Hammer (2019’s Wounds and The Social Network). She said she’d never experienced abuse from any of these men (then they’re INNOCENT!), and she felt sad “for the loss of great artists.” Yeeeah. Okaaaay. Huuuuh. Anywho, it’s more than a year later, and it sounds like Dakota’s sadness has ceased, and she’s finally moved on to the “joking about Armie Hammer being a cannibal” stage of her grief.
Variety reports that, last night, Dakota appeared at Sundance Film Festival’s inaugural dinner to present her Suspiria and A Bigger Splash director, Luca Guadagnino, with the international icon award. While onstage, she applauded Luca’s 2017 film, Call Me By Your Name, and joked that she was offered the part of Timothée Chalamet’s peach but had to turn it down due to scheduling conflicts. Then she added, “Thank God, though. I would have been another women that Armie Hammer would have tried to eat.” Because Armie’s character bites into the cum-peach in the movie and real-life Armie has an alleged cannibal fetish. It works on a couple different levels. Here’s the video:
Dakota Johnson jokes that she wasn’t cast in #CallMeByYourName: “Luca had asked me to play the role of the peach, but our schedules conflicted. Thank God, because then I would have been another woman that Armie Hammer tried to eat.” pic.twitter.com/9RZqeu4SCN
— Variety (@Variety) January 20, 2023
After Dakota made the joke, some of the audience laughed, and others made high-pitched “Ooooo!” noises that suggested they thought the joke was edgy. After that, she continued:
“It’s been five years since that film premiered here, and Luca hasn’t stopped taking us to exciting places,” Johnson said, nodding to Guadagnino’s latest film “Bones and All,” a romantic drama — also starring Chalamet — about two young lovers who also love human flesh. “Who knew cannibalism was so popular?” she joked, evoking laughter from the crowd at Park City’s Basin Recreation Fieldhouse.
Some people on Twitter are applauding Dakota for the joke, others are rolling their eyes because she once defended him. I, for one, am personally offended by the revelation that Luca offered the role of the peach to the biggest nepo baby in Hollywood. Do you know how many hard-working, talented peaches are out there? Hustling from audition to audition, just praying for the day a big star like Timothée Chalamet jizzes inside their bodies in an Oscar-winning film? FOR SHAME, the biz. For shame.
Pics: ROGER WONG/INSTARimages.com & Sara De Boer/startraksphoto.com