Open Post: Hosted By Omaha Steak’s Offer Of Lifetime Burgers If You Get A Get A Tattoo Of A Burger On Your Ass
Sometimes I think marketing people have it the worst. You have to try to get people to buy subpar merchandise, all while convincing your bosses that you can keep their million-dollar expectations under budget. It’s no wonder they come up with the most bizarre concepts to drum up business. Today’s example: get free food forever from Omaha Steaks IF you get a hyper-realistic burger tatted onto your butt! Who doesn’t want to have to explain the massive burger on your ass every time you go to the beach?
Long gone are the days when winter and spring mean putting your summer body on layaway by spending countless hours in the gym. Who has time for that when there are delicious carbs to be eaten and thousands of different beers to consume? This is most certainly the thought process of one man who reached out to Manchester-based tattoo artist Dean Gunther asking to have a set of ripped abdominal muscles immortalized onto his pale, fluffy tummy to avoid the responsibility of health and fitness. And of course, Dean was happy to take his money and mar his skin for the rest of his life.
When you make the kind of money Cardi B does, you never have to worry about working for anyone other than yourself. Well, scratch that. You still have to work for others, but the paycheck is a hell of a lot higher. Take, for instance, Cardi and her
first husband Offset‘s recent deal with McDonald’s. Their basic bitch burger, fries, and apple pie meal will send folks in droves to order the same shit they’ve been ordering since they were kids, despite opposition from some uptight franchisees. But in an attempt to spice up their marketing, Cardi has finally commented on the face tattoo of her youngest child Wave which appears in their McDonald’s ads. And no matter what people say, in regards to the tatt, Cardi is ba-da-ba-ba-BAHHHHH – Lovin’ it!
When there’s trouble in paradise, or in this case, in California by way of Florida, sometimes the only thing to do is DEFLECT – DEFLECT – DEFLECT! According to E! News, Brooklyn Peltz Beckham showed off a brand new tattoo, a giant portrait of Nicola Peltz Beckham’s face, his wifey of just under a year, after embarrassing details about the couple’s $13 million “shit-show” of a wedding, rife with secrets and superfudge (auto-correct and it stays), were revealed earlier this week. Brooklyn’s latest masterpiece is proudly on display in the Wifey Wing on his bicep and is now part of the permanent collection at the Brooklyn Museum of Matrimonial Art (BMMA).
Nobody with eyes (or ears) is ever going to doubt Jennifer Lopez’s commitment; be it to an aesthetic (sexy lady), a brand (Herses), a bit (TL4E) or her (current) relationship. So it should be no surprise that JLo used the Valentine’s Day holiday to reinforce all her commitments at once by sharing herses new couple’s tattoos with hubby Ben Affleck, dispelling any suggestion of trouble in paradise. If Ben proposed she gets a phoenix back piece to match his, then he doesn’t know Jen like we know Jen. JLo kept it cute with “an arrow piercing an infinity sign made up of her and Ben’s names” on her ribs (please nobody tell her Shotgun Wedding costar-for-a-day Armie Hammer!), according to E! News. And Ben got one of crossed arrows “with the couple’s first initials” I think, in his armpit.
Pete Davidson And Chase Sui Wonders Vacationed Together In Hawaii And It Looks Like He Removed His Kim Kardashian Tattoos
In PDT (Pete Davidson Time), his 9-month relationship with Kim Kardashian was a lifetime, so he devoted several tattoos to his “lawyer girl” and even got her and Kanye West’s kids’ initials, which was weird as fuck, honestly, and I’m still annoyed that stunt almost made me have to side with Kanye (in that situation only). But ever since “Kete” parted ways, Pete’s been busier than ever trying on “dream girls,” and if you blinked, you might’ve missed that he and Emily Ratajkowski were a thing for five minutes and he’s now moved on to his “great friend” Chase Sui Wonders. The two of them were just papped getting handsy in Hawaii, so since Pete is a repeat love-interest-tattoo-offender, we can all expect a “Chase 4 Eva” tattoo in the near future. Luckily, Pete cleared some prime space on his body body body for her because it appears that he’s gotten rid of all of his Kim-themed tattoos.