Category: Prince Charles
Prince Charles Will Reportedly Not Let Archie Become A Prince As He Plans To Slim Down The Monarchy
A couple of weeks ago, I saw the headline, “Baby Lilibet and Archie Will Inherit ‘Princess’ and ‘Prince’ Titles When Charles Becomes King,” and well, that aged about as well as the hairline of a male British royal. Because The Mail on Sunday claims that Prince Charles is already making plans for when he takes over The Crown and those plans include changing the Letters Patent to keep royals who are not directly in line to the throne from getting titles. If Charles makes that change, that means Prince Harry and Meghan Markle’s children, 2-year-old Archie Harrison and 2-week-old Lilibet Diana, won’t become Prince Archie and Princess Lillibet (which is a damn shame because that fancy name of Lillibet was made to have “Princess” in front of it). Cut to Harry furiously checking Amazon to see if they can same-day deliver a World’s Shittiest Dad mug to Charles on this Father’s Day. Although, Prince Hot Ginge may have already sent Charles one.
Prince William And Prince Harry Both Release Statements About The Results Of Martin Bashir’s Interview Investigation
Over the past six months, an independent investigation was conducted into Martin Bashir’s 1995 Panorama interview with Princess Diana, specifically, whether or not he manipulated Diana into agreeing to speak, by faking some bank statements that made it look as though some of her closest inner circle were selling details of her personal life. One year after it aired, the fake bank statements came to light, and the BBC stated that they didn’t matter, and that was that. Until 2020, when a third-party investigation happened. And yesterday, it was officially determined that Martin Bashir’s methods for landing that interview were deceitful. It’s a sad situation, made only sadder when you remember that Princess Diana died less than two years after she told her truth in that Panorama interview. Both Prince William and Prince Harry have decided to comment on the situation, and to the surprise of no one, they’re both pretty hurt.
Prince Harry Talked About The “Genetic Pain” His Dad And Grandfather Passed Down To Him
Two months into the job and Prince Harry is already earning that BetterUp signing bonus by talking about the “genetic pain and suffering” he inherited from his dad Prince Charles, who in turn inherited it from his dad Prince Philip. Giving Dax Shepherd (of all people, Oprah’s probably kicking herself for not having THAT conversation) the scoop of a lifetime, Harry appeared on the Armchair Expert podcast and swore to “break the cycle,” presumably, of dressing his kids up in those twee little outfits with the socks pulled up way too high. Archie Mountbatten-Windsor will be a Crocs kid.
Prince Harry Did Not Stick Around After Prince Philip’s Funeral To Reconcile With His Family
Can you believe the nerve of Prince Harry bouncing immediately following his grandfather’s funeral, blowing off his dad and brother, and leaving his bereaved, newly widowed granny to spend her 95th birthday alone for the first time in her life? Because that’s just what he did, but not before kicking a couple of THE QUEEN‘s corgi puppies on his way to the airport (metaphorically of course). According to The Daily Beast, Prince Harry failed to reconcile the “strained” relations between himself and his brother Prince William and father Prince Charles during his brief visit back to England to attend Prince Philip’s funeral.
The Royal Family Will Not Wear Military Uniforms To Prince Philip’s Funeral
Yesterday we learned that Prince Andrew wanted to bid adieu to his dearly departed daddy Prince Philip in an Admiral’s uniform, which was a weird thing to want to do, considering Prince Andrew never held the naval rank of Admiral. He was supposed to one day, but it didn’t happen, due to Andrew getting caught up in a sex trafficking situation and being forced to retreat from public life. There were rumors that Queen Elizabeth had to approve Andrew’s request, and the bad news for Andrew is that she didn’t do it. It would be very fun to laugh at Andrew slinking into church with a pissed-off pouty scowl on his face because Mummy made him wear some off-the-rack suit and not the fancy little military costume he wanted, but that’s not really the case here. According to sources, no one will be in military uniform at Prince Philip’s funeral this Saturday.
Prince Andrew, Who Is Not An Admiral, Wants To Wear An Admiral’s Uniform To Prince Philip’s Funeral
Prince Philip’s funeral is scheduled to happen this Saturday, which means if you’re one of the 30 people with an invite, you’ve got exactly three days to decide on what you’re going to wear. Black is traditional, although I’m sure Queen Elizabeth would find it acceptable if you showed up in emerald green, in honor of the logo on Philip’s favorite motorcoach. But according to sources, Prince Andrew is demanding he shows up at his dad’s funeral with an outfit from the house of Gilbert and Sullivan. Andy doesn’t currently hold the highest naval rank of Admiral, he never did hold that rank. And yet, Prince Andrew allegedly really, really wants an H.M.S. Pinafore moment on Saturday. As if that wasn’t laughable enough, sources are also saying that Andrew believes this could be the start of his big comeback into public life.