It’s a sad day for those who faked sick from school or work just to get a massive dose of Vitamin T (for trash) and Vitamin F (for fuckery) by taking in the industrial-strength messiness of Jerry Springer. Former Mayor of Cincinnati turned Master of Daytime Foolery, Jerry Springer, has died and is now hearing the chant “Jerry! Jerry! Jerry!” in the afterworld Jerry Springer was 79.

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Nick Cannon, better known as Tricky Dick Nicky amongst his children’s mothers, was at one time married to dethroned Queen of Christmas, Mariah Carey. And their love was odd because no one believed they belonged together, which eventually proved true after they got divorced. Now we know Nick has gone on to begin his mission of re-populating the Earth, which could be looked at as the lesser prize after having Mariah as your wife. And many believe that in the greater scheme of things, since Mariah will always be the bigger star, Nick was the one who dropped the ball on their relationship. However, Nick doesn’t believe that and thinks it’s actually the other way around.

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Though one of the highlights of Kim Kardashian and Pete Davidson’s chaotically eventful 9-month relationship was the two of them roasting her enormous ass and his pimply, neon white one (I’m assuming) as they humped in front of a fireplace in tribute to Kim’s beloved, freaky (and still alive) grandma, it looks like Pete won’t be roasting Kim when he returns to Saturday Night Live to host next week.

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Today in Florida, Mickey Mouse put on his best “sue a trick” ensemble of a business suit from Mice’s Wearhouse and a sturdy pair of bubble booties to stomp on his nemesis, Florida Governor Ron DeSantis. Disney has taken their fight against Ron DeSantis to court by filing a lawsuit against him. Ever since Disney shit on DeSantis for signing the “Don’t Say Gay” bill into Florida law, the two sides have been fighting it out. Disney invoked a royal clause to block a move from DeSantis against them, and DeSantis threatened to build a prison near Disney World. In their lawsuit, Disney said that they had no choice but to sue DeSantis over his “targeted campaign of government retaliation” against them as punishment for speaking out. They added that DeSantis is now threatening their business in Florida and has violated their First Amendment rights. I fully expect DeSantis to pull a move out of NYC and appoint a Florida rat czar to take out Mickey once and for all, but please. Mickey Mouse shits mountains of money on the daily so he can keep this fight going until the end of time! – NBC News

While promoting part two of The Sandy Crotch Chronicles (aka Dune: Part Two), Zendaya continued to prove that she can look hot while wearing anything as Timothee Chalamet looked like a member of a SWAT Team’s twink division – Lainey Gossip

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With every passing day, we get closer and closer to the release of Disney’s live-action version of The Little Mermaid. It comes out May 26. To satiate fans who are (sea)foaming at the mouth for that shit, Entertainment Tonight reports that Disney just released a new teaser trailer, the audio of star Halle Bailey singing Part of Your World, and a bunch of character posters. All your favorite animal sidekicks are there: Sebastian the crab (I thought he was a lobster this whole time), Scuttle the seagull, and Flounder the fish, skinnier and more dead-eyed than ever before! Continue reading