Open Post: Hosted By Cate Blanchett’s Giant Potato Chips Dress
In that picture, Cate Blanchett looks like she just saw a triple rainbow, or finally let out a stubborn doody bubble that was refusing to vacate her ass, or just learned that she saved 15% on her car insurance. Cate looks so happy and you too would be happier than Kanye looking at Kanye in a mirror if a bunch of potato chips were framing your chichis. Cate wore this Lay’s for Jessica McClintock dress to something called the “IWC Schaffhausen Dinner in Honour of the British Film Institute” in London tonight.
Yes, those giant chips look like they could’ve spent a little more time in the deep fryer, but that dress is still delicious-looking and it’s also pretty dangerous. If I partied with Cate while she was wearing this dress, the next day would be a sad one for me. I’d find myself trying to shit out fabric while going over the invoice that Cate gave me for ruining her dress by drunkenly eating the potato chip ruffles on it.
Pics: Wenn.com
Ryan Lochte Is Sad That His Bruh Michael Phelps Wasn’t There For Him After His Rio Drama
Michael Phelps and Ryan Lochte look like they’re having a gallon of chlorinated fun in that picture above, but it sounds like it might be the last shirtless Best Bros 4 Life selfie they will ever take together. Ryan recently spoke to USA Today about taking lemons (lying about getting held at gunpoint in Rio) and making lemonade (attempting to win back America’s love by shaking it on Dancing with the Stars). Sadly, Speedo isn’t the only who isn’t returning Ryan Lochte’s phone calls since the Rio incident. Ryan says he’s also having a hard time getting a hold of Michael Phelps.
Sympathy: Kunty Karl Has None For Kim Kardashian
Weird, right? As soon as I heard that Kim Kardashian was allegedly held at gunpoint by jewel thieves in Paree, I figured that Kunty Karl would immediately drop the virgin he was feeding upon and appear in a Chanel logo-shaped white cloud before her to comfort her. I mean, KK has photographed the lesser KK before, he scribbled out a note of support for her ass and he’s always the epitome of warmth. But if Karl did have a sympathetic bone in his regal vampire body, it wouldn’t feel a thing for Kim. In the Gospel According to Kunty Karl it states that if you’re going to flaunt that luxurious life in front of the peasants, you better protect that luxurious life with the damn A-Team.
Amber Rose Is Sorry For Accusing Julianne Hough Of Body-Shaming
Last week, Dancing with the Very Loose Definition of Stars found themselves attached to a little post-show drama over Amber Rose’s body. Amber claimed on an episode of Loveline with Amber Rose that after she and her partner Maksim Chmerkovskiy performed a salsa to Jennifer Lopez’s “Booty“, she overheard judge Julianne Hough make a crack about feeling “a little uncomfortable.” Amber accused Julianne of body-shaming her XXL ass and thighs. Julianne swore in a statement that she was only shading Amber’s slo-mo moves. Well, one week later, the boot-scooting booty battle has fizzled out with an on-air apology.
The Alien Lizard King Calls Out The Crazed Cumberbitches Who Think His Wife And Kid Are A PR Stunt
To me, Benedict Cumberbatch’s union with his wife Sophie Hunter is about as riveting as eating a plain rice cake while watching a re-run of Antiques Roadshow. (The Roadshowaloonies are totally going to shank me for that one.) But out there in the land of the internet are some Cumberbitches who make B. Cums and Sophie’s union sound real dramatic and interesting by saying that it was created by his PR team. Other Cumberbitches also think that Sophie was never pregnant and that their baby probably has Hasbro ™ branded into his body since he’s a doll! B. Cums had a few words to say about his hardcore tinfoil hat-wearing fans and if you’re one of them, get ready to rage-type, “HE READING FROM A SCRIPT!”
Demi Lovato Has More Thoughts About Taylor Swift’s Perfect Friends Squad
Demi Lovato has come many famous people in the past – Lady Gaga, Nicki Minaj, Mariah Carey, Olivia Culpo, just to name a few. But one of her favorite targets is Taylor Swift. Demi didn’t like the level of effort Taylor put into #FreeingKesha and she really doesn’t like Taylor’s idea of feminism. That last conversation happened back in May. Demi must have wanted to take the summer off to recharge her Taytred batteries, because she’s back and dragging Taylor again.