Prince Hot Ginge And Meghan Markle Did Not Make Their Public Debut This Past Weekend
Oh Photoshop, my dear old friend, you and I will probably have some inappropriate fun with that pic today.
Meghan Markle was visiting her royal man Prince Hot Ginge at Kensington Palace in London last week, and so some thought that maybe, just maybe, they’d cause us hard-up Harry Whores to break the ear drums of dogs with our high-pitched wails of pain by going public. The media thought that PHG and Future Princess Meghan was going to make their official debut at a rugby game at Twickenham Stadium in London on Saturday. But sitting next to PHG during the match between England and South Africa was Princess Charlene of Monaco, who looked like a discount Caroline Herrera impersonator (and that’s a compliment).
Demi Lovato Makes It Instagram Official With Her New Man
Less than a month ago, there was a rumor that Demi Lovato was being wooed by John Mayer. Taylor Swift’s least favorite couple never came to be. At the time, Demi was reportedly with 32-year-old UFC fighter Luke Rockhold, whose name name sounds like Barney Rubble’s Grindr username. Demi was seen being couple-y with Luke last week at an L.A. Rams game, but since she’s a millennial, their relationship can’t be upgraded to “confirmed” until they’re seen looking couple-y on social media. Demi did that yesterday.
Demi posted a picture on Instagram last night of her working the classic “Yes this is my man” hand-on-thigh pose.
https://www.instagram.com/p/BMxfhrJgCQP/
Luke posted the same photo, an action which I believe legally binds them together as famous boyfriend and girlfriend. The “last night” Demi is referring to was the UFC 205 fight at Madison Square Garden on Saturday. Demi and Luke were joined at said fight by Nick Jonas, who E! News says got in on Duke’s official social media debut by Snapchatting their date.
As for how serious Demi and Luke are, a source told E! last week that Demi wants to keep it casual right now. First he has to pass the ultimate loyalty test: how does he react during one of Demi’s messy Twitter rants? If he DMs her a message asking her to get off Twitter, he’s GONE. But if he joins in with tweets about people not being able to handle “his truth” or replying to haters with “delete your account“, he’s a keeper.
Here’s a bit more of Demi and Luke making sure the paps get enough good angles of their held-hands at UFC 205 on Saturday night.
Pics: Splash
What In Uncanny Valley HELL Did They Do To Chip And Mrs. Potts?
Over a week ago, I posted the first official pictures from that ~problematic~ bestiality tale of a captured nerd girl who must’ve done a lot of hard drugs, because she talks to clocks and shit and wet dreams about covering her lips (and not the ones on her face) with the lipstick belonging to her captor, a mean dog beast. (Beauty and the Beast is like a clean version of every NSFW subreddit.) And today, Disney pooped out the first official trailer, and well, this thing makes those first official pictures look like they’re full of life and charisma. This trailer has a resting heart rate of zero and is as lackluster as this dry stale English Muffin I’m chewing on (I’m out of butter).
Kourtney Kardashian And Scott Disick’s Storyline Kontinues
The only storyline Kourtney Kardashian has ever had on Keeping Up With Our Surgeries is her on-again/off-again relationship with the father of her three kids, Scott Disick. Every season, Kourtney shows up, eats a couple salads and talks about either leaving or “reconnecting” with Richie Rich’s long-lost California cousin Douchey Douche. When we last left Kourtney and Scott, they were off again. According to People, they’re in the beginnings of being on again.
Hot Sluts Of The Day!
Wonder Whims!
If you live in or around Calabasas, then you probably slept with two pillows covering your ears last night, because I’m sure Khlozilla did not stop howling up into the sky, and you can blame that all on the supermoon. The supermoon was like the Game of Thrones of moons to me. Because yesterday, the media kept saying that the supermoon was going to be magnificent and amazing and you must watch it, and after I saw it, I thought to myself, “Eh, not that super or amazing.” (Come at me, GoT nerds!) But after hearing who the turd crust-covered hairball picked for his chief strategist and after watching his surreal interview on 60 Minutes, many of us looked at that supermoon and paraphrased Tina Fey’s daughter when we said, “I want to move to there.” I did that, but since my brain is a dilapidated 80s time capsule, I also thought about a toy from the 80s that was some kind of moon creature that looked like a pink-haired Ziggy Stardust if a pink-haired Ziggy Stardust got struck by lightning at a rave on Venus.
Birthday Sluts
Adina Howard (43)
Cory Michael Smith (30)
Boosie Badazz (34)
Vanessa Bayer (35)
Russell Tovey (35)
Olga Kurylenko (37)
Obie Trice (39)
Travis Barker (41)
Josh Duhamel (44)
Butch Walker (47)
Janine Lindemulder (48)
Letitia Dean (49)
Nina Gordon (49)
Rev Run (52)
Patrick Warburton (52)
Laura San Giacomo (54)
Harland Williams (54)
D.B. Sweeney (55)
Gale Edwards (62)
Condoleezza Rice (62)
Yanni (62)
Sandahl Bergman (65)
Yimou Zhang (65)
James Young (67)
Prince Charles (68)
Louise Brooks (1906-1985)
Veronica Lake (1922-1973)
Pic: MySpace