THE QUEEN has been gone for over a week now yet the mourning period in the UK continues to march on. I mean this quite literally as her passing has given birth to what will eventually be considered Britain’s greatest achievement: the Queue (or the long-ass line to the more uncouth). Commoners (and David Beckham) have been given the opportunity to see THE QUEEN lying in state but in order to do so, they gotta stand in a 5-mile, potentially 30-hour long queue. THE QUEEN’S Queue has been SO popular that there’s now a queue to join the queue! Based on this display one could say that the British people’s love for orderly standing surpasses their love for their monarchy! However, not everyone is keeping disciplined. There were a few rogues that were determined to make the Queue a(n even more) horrible experience.

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Lily, the cat who went missing for four days before showing up on her human’s Ring cam to possibly say, “Mom.”

Seen above closing her eyes like, “Ugh, will the press please stop calling me already? The life of a world-famous pussy, I swear,” is Lily, a cat who has become internet famous for a minute thanks to her surprise appearance on her family’s Ring cam after she went missing for four days. It’s the “Surprise, Bitch” reboot that’s better than the original!

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While I say “nope” and turn around every time I see a line that requires my lazy ass to stand for longer than 5 minutes, David Beckham stood in line with everyone else for over 12 hours to see THE QUEEN lying in state at Westminster Hall. He even dressed up for the occasion! Well, when it comes time for King Charles to hand out knighthoods, we’ll hear a high-pitched screech coming from England if Charles doesn’t knight David Beckham. Because David Beckham didn’t wait for over 12 hours in line while dressed up like a Mary Poppins extra for King Chuck to NOT make him Sir Becks! – Just Jared

Someone must have interrupted King Charles as he lost it over another leaky pen (listen, as a tampon, he’s serious about leaks) to let him know that The Palace was getting shit over some dress code drama. Previously, Prince Harry was not allowed to wear his military uniform to THE QUEEN’s vigil since he’s not a working royal anymore, but creep Prince Andrew was allowed to be in uniform at today’s vigil. King Charles has now reversed that decision and Harry will get to wear his uniform at tomorrow’s vigil – Lainey Gossip
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Yesterday GQ published a piece about the growing popularity of leg lengthening surgery. Wait, is this actually for real? Apparently so! The article claims that more and more men are getting a “a radical and expensive surgery” that adds three to six inches to their height. Unfortunately, it requires having both of your femurs broken. Hey, if Tom Cruise can hang off the side of a flying plane for Mission: Impossible, he can deal with a couple of smashed thigh bones.

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Long before the world was treated to Jesse Williams‘ exposed baseball bat from Take Me Out he was one half of a  crumbling marriage with real estate broker Aryn Drake-Lee. Unfortunately, Jesse strayed from home field on a couple of away games, leading to their inevitable divorce. However, they have children together so they’ll never be completely done with each other. Well, scratch that. Aryn is definitely done with Jesse, especially since she’s claiming his parenting skills are just about as subpar as his attempts at fidelity.

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