On Tuesday, Erika Jayne of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills got a win in her never-ending legal battle over her estranged husband Tom Girardi’s alleged scheming ways. Two of Tom’s ex-colleagues, attorneys Philip R. Sheldon and Robert P. Finn, sued Erika in a $5 million fraud lawsuit for aiding and abetting Tom in his alleged embezzlement crimes. But Los Angeles Judge Richard Fruin ruled that there’s no evidence that Erika participated in Tom’s scam. Philip and Robert plan to appeal that ruling. So that’s one win for Erika, but recently, she also got hit with the news that Tom used stolen funds on his alleged mistress Judge Tricia A. Bigelow for a beach house. And Erika is not happy about it.

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Jizzy Jewelry!

Cartier, Tiffany & Co., Harry Winston, Mikimoto, and every other fine jeweler in the game are about to reach for bankruptcy papers because it’s over for them now that there’s a line of jewelry made from sperm. Just call the line Nutier or Tiffany & Cum, or Harry Jizzston, or Jizzimito! But the line is actually called Jizzy Jewelry and it comes (pun intended) from Canadian TikToker, jeweler, and sculptor Amanda Booth. Amanda already made jewelry out of cremated ashes, locks of hair, breastmilk, and other bodily fluids, but didn’t think to make jewelry out of dick leche until someone asked her if she’s ever made pieces from “man juices.” Amanda joked in a Facebook post about making “jizzy jewelry” and that joke led to her getting actual requests from people who wanted to memorialize their man’s pearl necklace cum shot on their chest with an actual necklace. So Amanda made their dreams cum true. Every kiss begins with KUM!

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Cher is already the Cher of EVERY generation, but sadly, there are some people out there who are not educated about the fact that Cher’s relevancy will live forever and there’s no one like her. One Twitter user tweeted that Dua Lipa is the Cher of our generation, and another user chimed in with, “So much truth in one tweet,” while daring to tag Cher! Well, Cher herself decided to school the children and responded with, “How many yrs are in a generation.” That Twitter user was never able to respond because they turned to dust and were never heard from again! – Just Jared

The epitome of romance IS Johnny Depp giving his then-girlfriend Kate Moss a butt sweat-covered diamond necklace that he hid in his ass crack. I’m sure that peak romantic gesture gave Kate a case of the dizzies. Or she got the dizzies from the shitty stench of it all – Jezebel

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Like Pinnochio, the book Winnie The Pooh by A.A. Milne has recently entered the public domain meaning Disney’s vice grip on those properties has slipped enough that Guillermo del Toro has a competing Pinnochio movie coming to Netflix and some sicko with a honey fetish has Pooh and Piglet running around with axes making mincemeat out of women in the new horror film Winnie the Pooh: Blood and Honey. Personally, I’d prefer to see WTP turned into a porno based on that time he got his ass stuck in Rabbit’s gloryhole, but I suppose that probably already exists.

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A recent viral TikTok shows a Southwest Airlines pilot giving his Mexico-bound flight a stern talking-to after some passengers AirDropped him nude pics before takeoff. How many people did this? Were the photos of the passengers themselves or random naked people found on Google? Was the pilot hot? We may never know the answers to these questions, but the situation was serious enough for the pilot to get on the PA system and threaten to go back to the gate and ruin his passengers’ vacation if they didn’t quit it. Sky-Daddy is pissed.

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