Jenny McCarthy probably spent her Sunday furiously fapping to Woody Harrelson’s Saturday Night Live monologue over and over again. Because Woody hosted SNL this weekend, and during his opening, he pushed an anti-vax conspiracy theory. Woody said that he read a movie script where the “biggest drug cartels in the world get together and buy up all the media and all the politicians and force all the people in the world to stay locked in their homes. And people can only come out if they take the cartel’s drugs and keep taking them over and over.” Woody then burped up, “I threw the script away. I mean, who was going to believe that crazy idea? Being forced to do drugs? I do that voluntarily all day long.” Woody has pushed anti-vax shit before, so this is nothing new for him. But that anti-vax mess aside, Woody’s entire SNL monologue was an incoherent train wreck. I almost texted his monologue to my friends and family with the question, “Is this what I sound like when I’m totally baked?” but I really don’t want to know the truth. I’m never stoned enough for that! – The Daily Beast

God might be slipping a card for a vasectomy doctor under Nick Cannon’s door because he recently said that God “will decide” when he’s done with making more children – Complex

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According to Puck News, Zendaya has re-negotiated her Euphoria contract, and for the show’s upcoming third season, she will earn “close to” one million dollars an episode. Damn, just 26 years old and already making Friends final-two seasons money! For her performance as Rue, Zendaya has won a Critic’s Choice Award, a Golden Globe, and two Lead Actress in a Drama Series Emmys. And all while working in an allegedly “hellish” work environment with shooting days that can sometimes last up to 18 hours. So, good for her! And now Zendaya can give her co-star Sydney Sweeney a little loan so that Sydney can finally take that six months off! Continue reading

Hopper Penn, perhaps best known for his role in 2018’s Hamilton County Jail, the reality show which earned $25,000 at the bond office, in which he played Sean Penn and Robin Wright’s son waiting to be bailed out on possession charges for weed, shrooms, and amphetamines, recently waded into the murky waters of the nepotism debate and, like a chicken with a thimble full of water, immediately drowned. During an E! News segment he did with his mom, while promoting his latest project, a movie produced by his mom in which his mom plays his mom, Hopper admitted that while “every movie I’ve done has been with a family member,” he doesn’t “think it’s nepotism.” Even though, as he himself admitted, he was “given the opportunity with almost no preparation,” and “it was able to kind of just fall into [his] lap,” as if by magic. But according to Deadline, after giving it a bit more thought, Hopper has come to the conclusion that he said what he said.

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Cardi B is a changed woman. Cardi has finally started her long-delayed, mandatory 15 hours of community service. Or, what we like to call, the bare minimum. Because slaps on the wrists are to be expected when you have one of Donald Trump’s attorneys on your legal team. But she wants us all to know that this experience is the best thing to ever happen since having a Mcdonald’s meal named after her and her man Offset. Who knew ordering a hit on two women could become such a blessing?

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A year-and-a-half ago, Christina Applegate revealed that she had been diagnosed with MS at age 49. At the time, she’d just started filming the third and final season of Netflix’s Dead to Me. Production took a hiatus so Christina could get treatment and process her “loss of life.” Five months later, she returned to set and fought like hell to finish filming despite her mobility issues. Christina’s performance was nominated for a 2023 SAG Award for Female Actor in a Comedy Series. People reports that, last night, 51-year-old Christina showed up to the awards accompanied by her 12-year-old daughter, Sadie, and a walking cane emblazoned with the hashtag “FU MS”. I’m not gonna lie to ya; when I first saw “FU MS”, I thought that was the name of the type of multiple sclerosis she was battling. But, no, you moron (said to mirror), Christina’s saying, “Fuck you, MS!” Continue reading