Cate Blanchett Calls For The End Of Televised Awards Shows While Accepting A Critics Choice Award On The CW…

The Critics Choice Awards aired on The CW last night, and a not-so-surprising guest crashed that shit like, “Bitch, I’m STILL here.” I’m talking about COVID-19. Nominees Colin Farrell, Brendan Gleeson, and Jamie Lee Curtis, as well as presenter Michelle Pfeiffer, had to sit the show out after testing positive for Coronavirus. COVID-19 didn’t fuck with Cate Blanchett, though. She showed up to last night’s ceremony, won Best Actress for her performance in Tár, and used some of her time on stage to praise all actresses in the business and also declared that we need to finally call the time of death on the “televised horse race” known as awards shows. And then Cate galloped away with her Critics Choice Award in hand to place it right next to her two Oscars, three BAFTAs, four Golden Globes, three SAG Awards, and many other horse race prizes.

The nominees for the Critics Choice Best Actress in a Film included Cate, Michelle Yeoh (Everything Everywhere All At Once), Viola Davis (The Woman King), Danielle Deadwyler (Till), Margot Robbie (Babylon), and Michelle Williams (The Fabelmans). While wearing a linen ensemble from the Haus of Parachute Sheets, Cate accepted her trophy from presenter Ben Stiller and first thanked Julia Roberts for awarding her with a much better trophy (a bottle of mouthwash) earlier in the night and called her Critics Choice award “arbitrary” considering all the great performances from actresses in 2022. And after paying tribute to Tár’s writer/director Todd Field, she brought everyone to her anti-awards show TED Talk by shitting on televised awards shows. Cate won at the Golden Globes last week, but she didn’t show up, so she wasn’t able to give her anti-awards show speech then. Or maybe she just did it at the Critics Choice Awards because they forced her to slum it by appearing on The CW! What a TV snob!

“I can’t believe I’m up here. This is ridiculous! I’m so old! Thank you, and thank you to all my fellow nominees. Look, I would love it if we would just change this whole fucking structure. It’s like, what is this patriarchal pyramid where someone stands up here? Why don’t we just say there was a whole raft of female performances that are in concert and in dialogue with one another? And stop the televised horse race of it all? Can I tell you, every single woman, whether television, film, advertising, tampon commercials, whatever, you’re all out doing amazing work that is inspiring me continually. So thank you, I share this with you all.”

Deadline says that Cate added backstage that she believes there must be “a different way of celebrating performances.”

Some praised one of this season’s most-awarded race horses for keeping it real, while others labeled Cate as Cate the Awards Show Ingrate and awarded her with the trophy for the Best Eye Roll-Inducing Acceptance Speech. Maybe Cate sharted on awards shows to try to give Michelle Yeoh an upper hand in the Best Actress Oscar race? I don’t know, but I do know that Cate missed an opportunity to honor noted crown-sharer Cady Heron from Mean Girls by breaking off pieces of her Critics Choice Award and tossing them at all the actresses in the audience. Here’s Cate’s speech:

Cate Blanchett won best actress on Critics' Choice Award 2023, full speech. pic.twitter.com/IoN3wjzGoT

— J (@cakeblancket) January 16, 2023

Other winners in the film categories included Everything Everywhere All At Once (Best Picture, Best Director, and Best Supporting Actor for Ke Huy Quan), Angela Bassett (Best Supporting Actress for Black Panther: Wakanda Forever), RRR (Best Foreign Language Film), Glass Onion: A Knives Out Mystery (Best Comedy and Best Acting Ensemble), and Brendan Fraser for his performance in The Whale. Brendan beat out Austin Butler (Elvis), Tom Cruise (Top Gun: Maverick), Colin Farrell (The Banshees of Inisherin), Paul Mescal (Aftersun), and Bill Nighy (Living). Brendan brought the raw emotion and cried during his speech, thanking the critics for waking up to him and The Whale’s Darren Aronofsky for casting him. Brendan ended his speech with some positive words for anyone who’s in a bad place:

“If you, like a guy like Charlie, who I played in this movie, in any way struggle with obesity or you just feel like you’re in a dark sea. I want you to know that if you too can have the strength to just get to your feet and go to the light, good things will happen. Thank you. Goodnight.”

Brendan was played off by the band, but that play-off music sounded more like a beautifully poignant soundtrack to the end his speech:

Brendan Fraser’s acceptance speech after winning Best Actor 😭🖤 #CriticsChoiceAwards pic.twitter.com/iQgFe4FnjS

— Natalie ❁ (@livelyackles) January 16, 2023

Over on the TV side, winners included The Dropout (Best Limited Series and Best Actress in a Limited Series for Amanda Seyfried), Better Call Saul (Best Drama Series, Bob Odenkirk for Best Actor in a Drama Series, Giancarlo Esposito for Best Supporting Actor in a Drama Series), Weird: The Al Yankovic Story (Best Made For TV Movie and Best Actor in a Made For TV Movie for Daniel Radcliffe), Jennifer Coolidge (Best Supporting Actress in a Drama Series for The White Lotus), Jean Smart (Best Actress in a Comedy Series for Hacks), Jeremy White (Best Actor in a Comedy Series for The Bear), Niecy Nash-Betts (Best Supporting Actress in a Limited Series for that Dahmer shit), Paul Walter Hauser (Best Supporting Actor in a Limited Series for Black Bird), and Zendaya (Best Actress in a Drama Series for Euphoria). Abbott Elementary picked up the award for Best Comedy Series, and one of its stars, Sheryl Lee Ralph, won Best Supporting Actress in a Comedy Series. And as she did at last year’s Emmys, Sheryl Lee Ralph gave another magnificent speech worthy of The Magnificient Speeches Hall of Fame. After mentioning that the great Sidney Poitier gave her words of encouragement when she felt like there was no place for her in the industry, she thanked Abbott Elementary’s creator Quinta Brunson before summoning us to get closer to the screen. Sheryl Lee Ralph then brought the spirits of Stuart Smalley and RuPaul together with a little self-love sermon:

“People don’t have to like you. People don’t have to love you. They don’t even have to respect you. But when you look in the mirror, you better love what you see. YOU better love what you see. Thank you to the critics! Thank you!”

And here’s that moment:

“when you look in the mirror, you better love what you see” -Sheryl Lee Ralph #criticschoice pic.twitter.com/m7KJOXEUUI

— SΞAN (@Seanlofficial) January 16, 2023

Maybe Cate Blanchett is onto something. Maybe we should do away with awards shows, and only so we can replace them with three hours of Sheryl Lee Ralph delivering pep talks for the ages!

And here are some looks from last night’s horse race:

Pics: BauerGriffin/INSTARimages.com/Cover Images