Category: THE QUEEN

“The Crown” Hater Dame Judi Dench Was Reportedly In Talks To Play The Queen Mother In Season Five

October 25, 2022 / Posted by:

Advantage: Dench. But at what cost? Yahoo! News reports that thanks to Dame Judi Dench’s op-ed that ran in The Sunday Times admonishing Netflix for playing fast and loose with the facts on its hit show The Crown, the network has capitulated and added a disclaimer under the season five trailer indicating that anything you might hear or see about, for example, King Charles III’s menstrual product fantasies in relation to Judi’s friend Queen Consort Camilla, is merely a “fictional dramatization,” of events that may or may not have occurred and been committed to tape for all the world to hear. Now, the only “crude sensationalism,” as Dame Judi so haughtily put it, Netflix can be accused of is leaking the fact that Dame Judi herself had been in talks to play The Queen Mother this season, but reportedly turned it down, in part, because they weren’t going to pay her as much as Imelda Staunton CBE, who plays THE QUEEN.

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The Trailer For “The Crown” Is Here And Judi Dench Calls The Show “Cruelly Unjust”

October 20, 2022 / Posted by:

The fifth season of The Crown premieres November 4, and everyone and their QUEEN-lovin’ grandmum is in a tizzy. First, we heard that the Royals are nervous about the show covering all their 90s scandals, namely everything Princess Diana-related. And maybe they’re right to worry, cuz yesterday it was revealed that the show will cover King Charles and Queen Consort Camilla’s Tampongate. Yesterday also brought us an open letter to The Times UK, courtesy of an absolutely fucking pissed-off Dame Judi Dench. She calls the show “cruelly unjust,” and says she supports the campaign to add disclaimers about the show being fictional. Well, today, the trailer for Season 5 finally dropped, and there ain’t no stinking disclaimer. Watch out, Netflix, Judi’s comin’ for ya!

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“The Crown” Producers Are Stressing Out About Filming Princess Diana’s Death

October 13, 2022 / Posted by:

The fifth season of The Crown premieres November 9, and the Royals aren’t the only ones with their fancy knickers in a twist. Deadline reports that the show’s creatives are “on edge” about having to film Princess Diana’s death in Paris. At first I thought, “Shit, these guys really left it ’til the last minute!” But, nope. The scene is actually being filmed for the show’s sixth season. Creator Peter Morgan has confirmed the crash itself won’t be filmed, but the paparazzi car chase and immediate aftermath will. Ironically, one of their concerns is that real life paps will snap a picture of production recreating Di’s death and “create uproar in royal circles.” Everyone behind the scenes wants to handle the scene extra-sensitively, especially with the recent passing of THE QUEEN. Well, if they do fuck it up, big whoop. It’s not like the real-life Royals handled Diana’s death any better. Continue reading

Mike Tindall, Husband Of THE QUEEN’S Granddaughter, Will Appear On “I’m A Celebrity, Get Me Out Of Here!”

October 12, 2022 / Posted by:

Hang onto your stupid, over-the-top British fancy hats, because, today, history has been made. The Sun is reporting that former rugby player Mike Tindall, who is married to Zara Tindall (THE QUEEN’S granddaughter/Princess Anne’s daughter), has signed on to star in the upcoming season of I’m A Celebrity…Get Me Out of Here! You know, that British reality show where stars must survive in the Australian wilderness and eat bugs and other gross shit for charity. Mike’s involvement will be the first time a Royal has appeared on reality TV. The first of many, hopefully. Now, let’s all close our eyes and manifest Queen Consort Camilla’s involvement in Celebrity Big Brother.

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King Charles III Will Be Crowned On June 3, 2023

October 6, 2022 / Posted by:

It’s happening, whether we like it or not. Bloomberg reports that King Charles III’s coronation ceremony is set to take place on June 3, 2023. This is exactly 70 years (and one day) after THE QUEEN was crowned on June 2, 1953. Queen Elizabeth was 26 when she took the throne. By next June, Charles will be 74, making him the oldest person to be crowned king in British history. So the phrase “Long live The King!” is, well, optimistic. Continue reading

Meghan Markle And Prince Harry Are Reportedly Butting Heads With Netflix Over Cuts They Want To Make To Their Docuseries

October 5, 2022 / Posted by:

Since America famously did an entire revolution so we wouldn’t have to concern ourselves with whatever it is King Charles III gets up to in his free time, it’s flummoxing to me that his son and his son’s wife, Prince Harry and Meghan Markle, seem fixated on becoming the American Royalty they so obviously think we need, when we already have the Kardashians, the American Royalty we so obviously deserve. Our interest in The Sussexes is for entertainment purposes only, so if they’re not going to serve us up a heaping Hungry Man helping of revolutionary schadenfreude by reminding us why we bounced in the first place, then what use are they to us?

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