Thanks to scores of Royal watchers, experts, reporters, and armchair enthusiasts, we know a lot of fun little details about the British Royal Family’s proclivities. Their likes, dislikes, quirks, and tics— from how THE QUEEN took her nightly gin to the reports that both Prince Andrew and now King Charles III still sleep with teddy bears— are all public knowledge. Still, despite near constant interest and attention paid to the minutiae of Royal life, apparently, nobody has bothered to find out how King Charles likes his eggs! And so, as with most societies that have been historically separated into the haves, the have-nots and the have-crowns, it is up to the average British citizen to decide for themselves how best to serve their sovereign. People reports that earlier today, one enterprising young subject took it upon himself to find out by lobbing raw eggs at Chuckie Trips and Queen Consort Camilla as they did a walkabout in the city of York. Turns out he prefers them cooked and on a plate.
Unless he’s the egg, in which case he prefers them hard-boiled and shoved up Camilla’s “Queen Crevasse.” Reportedly. According to People:
King Charles III showed his unflappable side when eggs were thrown at him and his wife Queen Camilla on Wednesday.
The King, 73, appeared unfazed as several eggs came within a few inches of the couple while they were on a walkabout in York. The couple was at the Micklegate Bar, a historic gateway in the northern English city where the monarch traditionally enters, when the eggs were thrown.
A protester — who reportedly called out, “This country was built on the blood of slaves” — was detained by four police officers, according to the Northern Echo.
King Charles was seen on video looking down as one egg whizzed past his face and splattered on the ground. Queen Camilla, 75, turned toward the direction of the egg thrower and briefly looked concerned. Charles continued with the conversation he was having before he and his wife turned and walked towards the crowd to continue their walkabout.
“About five eggs he’d managed to send,” witness Kim Oldfield told the BBC. “Camilla sort of flinched a little bit when the booing started, but [police] quelled it really quickly. Just a shame they spoilt what was a lovely moment.”
Here’s the clip of Charles and Camilla’s reaction to the start of the Great Yorkshire Pudding Revolt of 2022. Next time they’re coming armed with flour, suet and preheated ovens.
— Chris Ship (@chrisshipitv) November 9, 2022
Imagine wasting eggs like that. IN THIS ECONOMY!? If Charles really wanted to signal a new era of austerity for the monarchy, he’d have gotten down on his hands and knees and collected that shit for lunch with his little hanky. BBC News reports that the perpetrator, a 23-year-old University of York student, was heard screaming, “this country was built on the blood of slaves,” and was arrested and hanged on the spot for missing. No, he wasn’t, but I bet he’s gonna get laid like an egg once he’s released.
Shame what’s happened to that country. Something like this would have never happened under THE QUEEN’s reign when disaffected young men such as this would be on the dole and playing bass in an Oasis cover band instead of reading Engels at university and engaging in civil disobedience while making an audition reel for a spot on the next season of the Great British Bake Off/The Crown Season 7.
Pics: PA Images/INSTARimages.com/Cover Images