As you sit there preparing to tuck into a can of beans you heated up over a flaming barrel fire fueled with the last stick of a broken down dining room chair and a volume of out-of-date encyclopedias, try to remember— things could be worse. At least you have beans. Just not as many beans as Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson has. He earned $87.5 million dollars this year making him the highest-paid actor of 2020 according to Forbes.
Back at the beginning of June, many celebrities decided to lend their support to the Black Lives Matter movement and have some big, bold conversations about systemic racism. Like Blake Lively and Ryan Reynolds, who posted a five-part statement to social media, acknowledging how “uninformed” they were about racism, and that they had donated $200,000 to the NAACP to help mitigate their past “mistakes.” But they never specified what those mistakes were. Well what do you know, it would appear that one of the Lively-Reynolds’es finally got around to addressing the giant plantation in the room.
As promised, Taylor Swift dropped her eighth studio album last night, the capitalization-averse folklore. And in her latest album, Taylor has learned how to cuss, which means there’s about to be a whole lot of brave preteen transitions from “shoot” to “fuckin’ shit.” Along with the album, came the first music video, for the aforementioned “cardigan.” Because I’m about two decades late when it comes to music, my first instinct was to wait and see what The Cardigans had to say about all of this. But the similarities start and end at the name only. Because the only person Taylor could possibly be singing, “Love me love me, say that you love me?” to, is a piano repair person, while trying to get a discount on chipped key replacement and excessive moss removal.
As Gal Gadot organizes a stirring all-celebrity acoustic version of Fight The Power (which I’m sure she’ll release on Blackout Tuesday) to show her solidarity with the Black Lives Matters protesters, other famous types have opened up their purse and donated to organizations and bail funds like Black Visions Collective, Reclaim The Block, Unicorn Riot, The George Floyd Memorial Fund, the National Bail Fund Network, and many more. Blake Lively and Ryan Reynolds also opened up their purse and announced that they donated $200,000 to the NAACP Legal Defense Fund. And while announcing their donation, Blake and Ryan mentioned past mistakes they’ve made when it comes to racism in this country. That caused many of us to throw eyes at Blake NotSoLively’s past “AH DO DECLARE” moments of messiness.
The Peloton ad with HSOTD “Grace from Boston” seemingly trapped in a dystopian nightmare of Black Mirror-esque psychological abuse courtesy of her bland, grinning
overseer spouse has captured the attention of the country, and not in a good way. Ryan Reynolds struck while the news cycle was hot and got the ad’s actress, Monica Ruiz, to play her Peloton wife character in a new ad for his Aviation Gin. Wifey is free and her friends want her to drink up! Please God, drink up.
What you are looking at is a picture of Blake Lively premiering her surprise baby tummy at the premiere of Ryan Reynolds’ film Detective Pikachu back in May. And it kind of looks like Blake was telling Ryan a secret. It definitely wasn’t “That denim vest is hideous,” because that’s no secret. There is a chance the secret was “I’m not going to tell anyone when this baby pops out.” Because it’s October, and Us Weekly is saying Blake had her third child earlier this summer.