Woe Is Robert De Niro Who Claims That He’ll Be “Lucky” To Make $7.5 Million This Year Due To The Pandemic
Now for a heartbreaking story that will fill you with the sads. Robert De Niro was forced to cut his ex-wife’s monthly American Express limit from $100,000 to $50,000. Said ex, Grace Hightower, who he split from in 2018, responded by requesting an emergency order to raise her allowance back up to six figures.
But Robert says he’s taken a massive financial hit during the pandemic because the Nobu restaurants and luxury hotel he has stakes in have been closed (or partially closed) since March and aren’t making any money. Despite the Nobu brand receiving between $11 million and $28 million in PPP loans (the data released earlier in the week only disclosed the sum in ranges). Nobu-hoo, Nobu-hoo. An American tragedy. So basically, De Niro needs dinero. Continue reading
There used to be a time that if Robert De Niro opened his mouth, you might expect him to say something like, “I have nipples Greg, can you milk me?“, and we’d all laugh. But ever since Donald Trump became the 45th President of the United States, Robert De Niro has taken as many opportunities as possible to let us all know how he really feels about the situation. When Bobby D approaches a live mic, there’s a very good chance he’s either going to drag Trump, get bleeped several times for saying “fuck” while dragging trump, or both. Last night’s SAG Awards were no exception. He didn’t drop any f bombs, and he didn’t name Trump by name, but he did make it very clear he’s still on Team Not-Trump.
I guess Prince Andrew was too full of mummy’s turkey to attend his daughter’s engagement party last night. I can’t think of a single other reason he wouldn’t have been there. Oh well, tryptophan strikes again! Princess Beatrice and Edoardo “Edo” Mapelli Mozzi’s engagement party was held last night at Chiltern Firehouse, as originally planned. It was previously reported that the party had been cancelled due to the lack of privacy at the London venue because Bea didn’t want the paparazzi standing outside screaming “Andrew! Andrew! Look over here!” all night. Although he was in attendance at The Queen‘s annual pre-Christmas turkey lunch held earlier that day, Andrew was unable to attend the engagement party, presumably because he has another rare medical condition, one that gives him explosive diarrhea if he has even a bite of mummy’s turkey. Problem solved! The party was back on, and Andrew, again, presumably, spent the evening shitting his brains out and berating his footman to “wipe faster, you fool!” Obviously this is just a guess, why else would he miss it!? You can’t tell me Falklands war hero Prince Andrew is afraid of a couple of paparazzo. It’s not like he has anything to hide.
According to Graham Chase Robinson, the former personal assistant who Robert DeNiro is suing for watching too many hours of Netflix on the job, life at Canal Productions wasn’t all Friends marathons and a company paid Postmates Unlimited account. According to TMZ, Chase is suing Robert for wage violations, gender discrimination, and harassment. This means Chase is going to have the nearly impossible task of convincing a judge that Robert De Niro used profane language in the workplace. Maybe if she could catch him cursing on live TV or something, she might have a shot!
What you’re looking at is a picture of Robert De Niro mid-fuck. I’m sure there’s at least a handful of horny Raging Bull fans (or Meet The Parents, I don’t judge) out there who would prefer a literal picture of Robert De Niro mid-fuck. But for the rest of us, there’s more than just a picture of Bobby D’s tight “fuck” mouth and aggressive “Oh yes I did just said fuck on live TV” hands.
32 years later, the Hollywood feud of the century that I never knew about, still rages on. Mickey Rourke still hates his Angel Heart co-star Robert De Niro with the heat of a thousand tanning beds. According to Page Six, Mickey appeared on an Italian talk show and complained that he was “broke”, and it’s all Bobby D’s fault for cock blocking him out of a role in Martin Scorsese’s upcoming movie The Irishman. Mickey says that De Niro refuses to work with him because he “took him to school” on the set of Angel Heart, and De Niro was acting like a diva. Apparently, De Niro wouldn’t let Mickey speak to him or touch him. So now instead of looking him in the face, Mickey looks “right through his asshole.” PAGING RYAN MURPHY. We need this to be the focus of next season of Feud.