Category: Proposals
Open Post: Hosted By A Surprise Proposal That Was Shut Down By A Disney Employee
Disney theme parks are well-known for being places where whimsy abounds, smiles greet you at every turn, and dreams really do come true. That is unless your dream is to propose to your hopeful fiancée. Then it’s a big “HELL NO!” from the Mouse! You gotta pay for that shit! A video from Disneyland Paris is making rounds after a couple attempted and failed a proposal in front of the famous Sleeping Beauty castle. The moment the ring flashed onto the scene, a Disney crew member came up and SNATCHED it right out of the box. I guess the couple did get a magical moment because that Disney employee made that ring disappear!
Open Post: Hosted By The Failed McDonald’s Proposal
A man in South Africa has gone viral after he proposed to his girlfriend in a McDonald’s and got brutally, publicly rejected. The clip, which ended up on Twitter, shows the dude on one knee, presenting the unnamed woman with a little box (presumably there’s an engagement ring inside, but maybe a McNugget?). The crowd at the McDonald’s cheers, but the woman is having none of it. She shakes her head and says no to her would-be-fiancé. Then she walks out as the crowd boos. After her exit, the failed proposer stands back up and slinks away with his meal.
Here’s the worst part: it’s a McDonald’s… in a mall. Who in their right mind would say yes to a proposal in a mall McDonald’s? And don’t say Grimace, cuz everybody knows he’s a desperate purple slut with zero standards. Continue reading
Jennifer Lopez Doesn’t Want A Public Proposal From Ben Affleck
Bennifer rebooted last spring after a seventeen-year hiatus, and the engagement rumors started pretty much immediately. I totally get it. You’re lazy, you’re horny, you love attention; why not pick up where ya left off? Now, as far as we know, Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez are still just BF/GF. But yesterday, under the guise of promoting her bonkers-looking rom-com, Marry Me, JLo went on a radio show and shared her opinions on public proposals. Hey, if Jennifer Lopez is an expert on anything, it’s getting proposed to. Lady’s a five-time fiancée! Continue reading
Brooklyn Beckham Is Engaged To Nicola Peltz, His Girlfriend Of 7 Months
Last Wednesday, I received the sobering news that the Spice Girls’ “Wannabe” had turned 24 years old. After I stopped crying (and before I ran a comb-full of Just For Men through my hair), I sat down and realized the sheer fleetingness of time. Well, if Wednesday’s breakdown wasn’t bad enough, my Jurassic-era ass got another heaping dose of reality this morning when I was confronted with the fact that Victoria “Posh Spice” Beckham has a kid old enough to be married. And getting married is exactly what he’s doing. Annnd now I’m just waiting for the AARP brochures to start showing up in my mailbox.
Cassie And Her Hunky Boyfriend Are Engaged
I loathe the idea of elaborate proposals seemingly orchestrated specifically for Instagram. But when personal trainer Alex Fine rustled up a cowboy themed proposal for his pregnant girlfriend Cassie, Diddy‘s ex and The One That Got Away, I actually enjoyed it. Reason being, for one thing, much as his name implies, Alex is indeed fine. And for some reason, he slipped his greased-up torso into his engagement video. But I also enjoyed it because there aren’t enough 18-23 year olds on Leonardo DiCaprio’s green earth to make Diddy forget he let a good one slip away. Alex has provided Cassie with everything he couldn’t: A hot-shot of healthy sperm, rock hard abs, and the promise of undying love and devotion. And so to Cassie I say, hats off to you, little lady. Now giddy up off into the sunset!