Listen up, Martha. And also everyone else who has ever rolled their eyes at the pseudo-wellness l’huile de serpent (snake oil is so unrefined) that is peddled by Gwyneth Paltrow’s Goop. Gwyneth once again has a message for all those who don’t kiss at the ass of Goop.
When Martha Stewart heads into the kitchen, there’s nothing she likes more than dragging Gwyneth Paltrow like a home-raised chicken breast through flour for a chicken piccata dinner for 20. So when she went on Watch What Happens Live last night, she snatched Andy Cohen’s shit-stirring crown and wore it while she fielded calls about Gwyn.
Because Goop is an organic ostrich with its head very deep down in the sand, Gwyneth Paltrow has decided to take some of it offline and into a print magazine. It gets better than that. UsWeekly says they’re going to try and charge basic betches $15 a pop for it. Charging too much for things we already get for free on the internet? Oh Gwyneth, never change.
When I free associate on the name Gwyneth Paltrow these are the first things that pop into my mind: Vaginas, dietary restrictions, Brad Pitt, aggressively Caucasian, talks weird, head in a box. Gwyneth recently appeared on Sophia Amoruso’s Girlboss podcast (via Page Six), and she managed to reaffirm most of them in a single interview! But the big take away is that Gwyneth revealed she is romantically challenged, and once again admits she was to blame for things not working out with Brad.
Gwyneth Paltrow woke up this morning with an email from nonprofit consumer watchdog group Truth in Advertising (aka TINA). Rather than words, it was just a clip of Dionne Warwick saying, “I got your number, hussy.” OK, maybe she didn’t get that, but she done pissed off TINA!
The go-to footwear for Mario Batali and Memaws and Pepaws at The Villages in Florida (how else would they shuffle between old timer sex parties??) is on life support!
The New York Post reports Crocs got slapped back from the patent folks after spending years suing rivals for stealing their design… this is kind of like when you hear someone is trying to steal your eccentric uncle’s ’82 El Camino. Sometimes you just let a broad take that shit! The brand is also cutting back on how many stores it runs: Continue reading