Category: Trials Of The Century

Gwyneth Paltrow Won’t Be Getting Her Ski Trial Legal Fees Back, After All

May 2, 2023 / Posted by:

The smugness and hilarity of Gwyneth Paltrow and Terry Sanderson’s 8-day ski accident trial held us in a tight grip a few months ago and ended when the jury sided with Gwyneth and found Terry Sanderson at fault for the crash that caused her to miss “half a day of skiing,” and left him alleged health issues. This meant he’d be on the hook to pay Goopy her sanctimonious statement damages of $1, along with her legal fees. And just when we thought that was all over and a new sham of a case came along to captivate us (Jury Duty, of course), Goop and Terry are back in the news since their lawyers met and eventually agreed to drop the part about him paying her lawyers. 

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The Alleged Victim In Gwyneth Paltrow’s Ski Accident Trial Claims He Can No Longer Enjoy Wine Tasting Because Of Her

March 23, 2023 / Posted by:

A scream pierces the crystalline blue skies above a pristine alpine wonderland. Suddenly, chaos. A once “charming” man’s life is forever altered. He is, after a run-in with one Gwyneth Kate Paltrow, AKA the Cashmere Yeti, “no longer charming.” So says the attorney of Terry Sanderson, the man who claims his ability to enjoy the finer things in life, like wine tasting, was snuffed out in an instant when Gwyneth plowed into him on the bunny slope of the Deer Valley Resort in Park City, Utah on Feb. 26, 2016, a day that will live in infamy. The stakes literally could not be higher for Gwyneth as she continues to fight for her honor in a drab and drafty civil courtroom. Gwyneth stands accused of causing Terry to suffer “a life-altering brain injury” as a result of her “neglect, her choices and her disregard,” according to The Washington Post. Terry, 76, is suing Gwyneth for $300,000, down from his initial request for $3 million. Gwyneth is counter-suing for $1.

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R. Kelly’s Attorney Compared Him To Martin Luther King Jr. In His Closing Arguments

September 24, 2021 / Posted by:

All this time I thought Robert Sylvester Kelly was on trial for some repugnant ass shit like sex trafficking and racketeering, but according to his attorney, he was actually on trial for defending The US Constitution and the “freedom of speech” and “freedom of assembly” guaranteed to all within that hallowed document. Much like Robert’s fallen comrade, the great Martin Luther King Jr. Yes, he really said that mess with a straight face in a court of law while delivering his closing arguments at R. Kelly’s trial.

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The Jury In The Harvey Weinstein Case Was Subjected To Nude Photos Of Him

February 5, 2020 / Posted by:

So, we’ve already had Harvey Weinstein’s genitals and blackhead situation described for us in detail in testimony given during his current rape trial. It was difficult, but after deleting the garlic bulb and chocolate chip emojis from our phones, we were able to sleep, and maybe even enjoy the weekend a little, though still haunted by the specter of what we learned from one of Harvey’s accusers, Jessica Mann. For those of us who are, blissfully, not personally connected with the Weinstein trial, Friday’s revelation was the worst of it in terms of hearing about his genitals. Not so for the jury who were shown photographs of Harvey’s naked body in the courtroom yesterday. And even more not so for the courtroom sketch artist who had to render them. Puppies after the jump!

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Harvey Weinstein Hobbled Into Court In NYC As New Charges Were Filed Against Him In LA

January 6, 2020 / Posted by:

Poor Harvey Weinsten just can’t catch a break! First, he wasn’t even invited to the Golden Globes last night. And now, on the first day of his trial for rape in New York, he was hit with brand new rape and sexual assault charges in Los Angeles. To make matters worse, he got gum stuck on the bottom of one of the tennis balls on his walker. Could Harvey’s day get any worse!?! According to the Associated Press, possibly!

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A$AP Rocky’s Swedish Assault Trial Has Begun

July 30, 2019 / Posted by:

Say what you will about the allegedly abhorrent conditions of the Swedish prison system, but you’ve got to hand it to their judicial process because less than a month after his arrest for assault,  A$AP Rocky is already having his day in court. I feel like in America, the accused have to wait longer for a trail after they’re arrested than we have to wait between seasons of an HBO Signature series. They turned that shit over faster than Bravo pumps out new episodes of Real Housewives. TMZ reports that Rocky’s trial began on Tuesday with Rocky pleading not guilty of assault; claiming self defense. He could face a maximum of 2-years in jail, however prosecutors say they wouldn’t go that far if he’s found guilty.

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