Gwyneth Paltrow Is Proud That The Term “Conscious Uncoupling” Helped People Accept Their Divorces

Years ago, when Gwyneth Paltrow and her ex-husband Chris Martin decided it was time to part ways, she didn’t announce it like normal folks. Instead of saying, “Hey y’all, me and Chris are getting divorced,” she instead got all Oxford English professor on us by unleashing the term “conscious uncoupling.” I think we all collectively hated her a bit more for such a pretentious coupling of words, but somehow it caught fire with her horde of brand-addicted zombies who fell in love with Goopy’s way of saying, “We fucked up our marriage.” Now years later, Gwyneth is giving herself a pat on the back for becoming the Dr. Phil of words by helping people accept their situation with the usage of the term.

According to People, Gwyneth is like a proud mama bear watching her cub destroy families and bank accounts, with the phrase that still sounds just as dumb as it did when she said it in 2014. But Gwyneth, a woman who definitely drinks her own sugar-free non-flavored Kool-Aid, actually cleared up the misconception that she came up with the term herself. And no, she didn’t throw a pen and pad at one of her underpaid workers and scream, “EXPLAIN MY DIVORCE!” Instead, the term was coined by author Katherine Woodward Thomas in 2009. However, Gwyneth must have been plotting on how to spin her divorce ahead of its announcement and realized Katherine’s words were just the perfect amount of GOOP for her.

“I definitely did not coin the phrase, but I feel despite us taking quite a lot of s— for it when we first announced that all these years ago, I feel very proud that we were able to, maybe, make some divorces a little bit easier, happier,” Paltrow said in an Instagram Story question-and-answer session on Friday.

“It makes me feel pretty proud when people come up to me on the streets and say, ‘Thank you for introducing that concept because I’ve become good friends with my ex’ I’m very happy that we were able to play a small part in that cultural shift,” she added.

Okay, first of all, when is Gwyneth Paltrow ever in “the streets”? Unless she’s talking about the tiny patch of sidewalk she quickly scurries across from her chauffered SUV to Bergdorf Goodman, and even then, her bodyguards probably tackle any peasants who come near her. Second of all, the “people in the streets” who come up to the Saint of Pretentious Divorce Sayings to thank her are probably just her assistants in different disguises.

Pic: INSTARImages