Category: Boring Couples

Dakota Johnson And Chris Martin Are Really Dating

December 12, 2017 / Posted by:

Last month it was rumored that billionaire Elon Musk was trying to woo Dakota Johnson. A few weeks after that, Dakota Johnson was reportedly hanging around Chris Martin. Elon might want to consider setting his romantic sights on someone else, unless he wants to tangle with one of Chris Martin’s many scarves to get to Dakota. Because according to UsWeekly, Dakota and Chris are “definitely dating” now.

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Rachel Bilson And Hayden Christensen Have Officially Broken Up

September 20, 2017 / Posted by:

Tall glass of 2% milk Hayden Christensen and paper Dixie Cup of cucumber spa water Rachel Bilson have broken up after almost 10 years together. According to UsWeekly, they’ve been living separately for a few months with her in L.A. and him in Toronto, they now “they are completely, officially done”.

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Carey Mulligan Had A Hush Hush Baby

September 13, 2017 / Posted by:

Doe-eyed waif Carey Mulligan had a secret baby last month with her Mumford & Sons husband Marcus Mumford. It’s the couple’s second baby, they also have a 2-year old daughter named Evelyn Grace. True to form, Carey quietly appeared at TIFF (pics in the gallery below) and made nice nice with the public instead of being all sloppy and telling us about her reclaimed wine barrel birthing tub or whatever.

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Joaquin Phoenix And Rooney Mara Are Totally Cohabitating

September 7, 2017 / Posted by:

Yesterday’s winners for Most Low-Key Hollywood Couple Confirming Coupledom, Katie Holmes and Jamie Foxx, can go right ahead and step back into whatever secretive hidey-hole they’ve been in, because there’s a new winner in town. The New York Times’ T-Magazine (via Page Six) has revealed that Joaquin Phoenix and not-so-secret lover Rooney Mara are certified roommates with benefits.

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Jennifer Lawrence May Be Getting On This

October 18, 2016 / Posted by:

The UK’s second most trustworthy journal of note (after The Daily Mail, of course) The Sun claims that Jennifer Lawrence’s poon has gone from one balding sack of feelings to another! The Sun’s impeccable sources say that 26-year-old JLaw has been down-low doing 47-year-old director Darren Aronfsky, whose mind gave us the ass-to-ass scene in the always-feel-good-movie Requiem For A Dream. So if I was dating Darren, my first question to him would be, “Um, that ass-to-ass thing isn’t something you want to see or partake in, right? Because my greedy b-hole doesn’t like to share.” But maybe that’s just me.

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