During Katy Perry’s 72-hour live-streaming attention-fest, she ranked her three most recent boyfriend from best to worst in the sack. We learned Katy had a great time with John Mayer, a decent time with Orlando Bloom, and sitting comfortably on the lowest sex rung was Diplo. Diplo responded to the news by claiming he doesn’t even remember having sex with that woman.
It looks like someone has been learning a thing or two while playing dodgeball with the other toddler brats on the playground. Seven years ago, when Justin Bieber was just a fetus-aged asshole, someone perfectly hit his helmet of hair with a water bottle during a show. Well, what a difference seven years and dodging lessons from Dubya make.
It’s no coincidence that it looks like Sam Taylor-Johnson is getting ready to run far, far away from the Fifty Shades franchise; Sam called it quits after directing Fifty Shades of Grey. She didn’t give a reason for why she wouldn’t be working on the sequels, but she did wish whoever got the thankless job “nothing but success.” Sam is talking about it again, and she goes in this time.
One-time Fox News sweetheart Megyn Kelly made her debut on NBC News a little over a week ago with a Vladimir Putin interview, and it was supposed to be a real fucking get, or something, but it left some people screaming at her to take a long course at Howard Stern’s Night School Of How To Really Interview A Bitch, because she didn’t get anything out of him. Megyn is getting shit again and this time it’s for an interview that hasn’t even aired yet. On Sunday night, NBC will barf up an interview that Megyn did with conspiracy theorist and “performance artist” Alex Jones, who thinks the Sandy Hook Elementary massacre was a staged government hoax involving actors. Because Megyn gave a platform to a tinfoil hat-wearing ass nugget, she’s been dropped as host of a Sandy Hook benefit and her Sunday night show has lost a sponsor.
Several weeks ago, Scarlett Johansson was reportedly seen at a Saturday Night Live after-party putting some mouth moves on Weekend Update’s Colin Jost. Last week E! News asked Colin if he had anything to say about the Scarlett rumors, to which he replied: “What?! No way. No, I’m good.” He also said he was “very happy” in his personal life. Colin didn’t want to talk about it, and that sort of made me think it could have just been a drunken party hookup. As it turns out, it might not be so casual.
If you read that headline and then went, “Err, okay, let me scroll back down and spend more time with the masterpiece musical stylings of Sarah Dunne instead,” that woman on the left in the hot pink boa is doing an amazing impersonation of you.