Sorry, let me rephrase that. Because it sounds like Kate Beckinsale got ready for bed one night by burying her face in a mountain of drugs before passing out while counting sheep in ’80s power suits that can’t stop grinding their teeth.
Page Six is reporting that after a few months, the undying love of “Peckinsale” is over! Does this mean the shelf life of Pete’s wonder penis is decreasing? He better sprinkle some more MSG down his pants before he locks the next random hottie of his dreams in his intense sights. But good news for us, this might be the last post about these two (no promises).
After Ariana Grande became a single parent to Piggy Smalls Grande-Davidson by dumping Pete Davidson, he didn’t waste much time in rebounding (although is it considered rebounding when you were with your previous girlfriend for no longer than four seconds?) with Kate Beckinsale. This made another case for the government to declare Pete Davidson’s dick a weapon of mass destruction since it causes women to lose their minds and make the decision to date Pete Davidson. Kate was apparently not looking to get serious, but big dick has a way of changing a trick’s mind, because she was papped holding his hand and going to dinner with him and her mom. But after doing each other for about three months, they are letting their fuck parts cool down for a minute. That’s what People claims anyway.
It sounds like Kate Beckinsale is learning the hard way what it’s like having to deal with a barely post-adolescent man-child, and is probably thanking her lucky stars she had a girl instead of a boy. And Pete Davidson’s mom is probably wishing the same thing right about now. Pete appeared on The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon and revealed that he’s currently living in his mom’s basement, playing arcade games, and popping boners for animated video game chicks.
If Pete Davidson‘s big dick (moderately sized dick?) is the disease, then deleting your Instagram account must be the symptom, because peace-ing out of Insta seems to be a trend surrounding Pete and his BDE. Both Pete and Ariana Grande quit it while they were together, and now Pete’s current confirmed tonsil hockey partner Kate Beckinsale has deleted all of her Instagram pics. Kate must have been tired of comments from fans comparing her relationship with Pete to the Crypt Keeper and Teddy Ruxpin because of their 20 year age difference.
It’s been a little over two months since Pete Davidson and Kate Beckinsale left that Golden Globes after-party together, and many thought that she’d break up with him over a text during an Uber ride back home the next day. But they’re still at it, and now they’re at serious level: Dinner With Mom.