Jason Momoa And Lisa Bonet Are Done After Nearly 17 Years Together
Please bow your heads in observance of a minute of silence, out of respect for one of the hottest couples of our time calling it quits. After the minute commences, a pair of gorgeous doves will be released into the sky, never to be seen again, to symbolize true love vanishing from our eyes forever! Yes, I’m being dramatic, but what in the world is happening in this year of twenty twenty-two? Because Jason Momoa announced that he and Lisa Bonet are ending their marriage and going their separate ways.
Jason and Lisa have been together since 2005 when they met at a jazz club and were introduced by a mutual friend. Two years later, Lisa gave birth to their daughter Lola, and their son Nakoa-Wolf a year after that in 2008. For a very long, long time, it was assumed that Jason and Lisa were legally married, but in 2017, they revealed that they had only gotten married in October of that year. Long-term Hollywood relationships are so rare, and it truly felt like Jason would be ripping open packs of Polident soak for Lisa’s dentures several decades in the future, but that’s not happening. Lisa doesn’t do social media, so the announcement fell on Jason’s shoulders. Last night, Jason took to Instagram to share that he and Lisa felt the “squeeze” during the pandemic and are parting ways. And because Jason and Lisa have the energy of a couple of moonlight-charged crystals, their divorce announcement is reflective of such vibes:
Jason and Lisa are such enlightened spiritual beings, I bet they won’t even argue over spousal support (“What is money, anyway?“), custody of their kids (“Mother Earth is the child’s true custodian“), or who gets what property (“Namaste, my home is yours“). I bet Lisa won’t even be bothered if Jason finally cuts off the hair she loved so much. Hell, she’ll probably bring him a hand-forged knife blessed by a shaman, and ask if she may help guide him on his journey to part ways with his old self.
The only issue I can see here is Lenny Kravitz. Lenny and Lisa used to be married, and share one kid (Zoe Kravitz), and they seem to have a healthy, supportive relationship. It’s so healthy, that Lenny and Jason eventually became very close friends. So who gets Lenny now that they’ve split?! This might be the only reason these two hire lawyers and head into court. Lisa, you get Lenny every Monday to Thursday, and Sunday afternoon. Jason, you get Lenny on Friday nights and all major holidays.