Gratuitous titties, ass and dicks are about to make a comeback in a big way. Variety reports that HBO is rebooting True Blood, the show that put the “erection” in resurrection. And it’s being developed by Roberto Aguirre-Sacasa, the man who put the “erection” in Archie Andrews’ pants when he created Riverdale. Alan Ball, the show’s original showrunner, will return as an executive producer.
Matt Bomer Jokes About Feeling “Objectified” When Compared To Every Other Brown-Haired White Man In Ryan Murphy’s Hiring Pool
There’s been a long-running meme on Twitter that makes fun of Ryan Murphy casting brown-haired pretty white man after brown-haired pretty white man in American Horror Story and his other shows. If you’re Evan Peters, Sarah Paulson, or a come-to-life brunette Ken Doll, you will have job security for years to come thanks to Ryan. Well, Matt Bomer, one of the stallions from Ryan’s stable of Barbizon-trained-male-models-turned-thespians, piped up about being called a member of Ryan’s version Hitchock Blondes.
Shoeless Joe Jackson might have done something noteworthy in the sporting world (citation needed), but his feats/feets pale in comparison to the blinding expanse on the jaw of Beardless Joe Manganiello. According to People, Joe has shaved off his signature scruff at a time when most men are cultivating the same. Joe and his wife Sofia Vergara separately posted pictures of Joe’s new babyface taken at a backyard family pool party on Instagram. People says he looks “like a completely different person,” but I think we’re going to need to see him without his swim trunks on, just to be sure.
I must admit, I was one of those suckers who watched True Blood to the bitter, fairy dusted, laughably accented end. It wasn’t perfect, ok, it wasn’t “good”, but it filled my eyes with many sexy butts plus Lafayette (RIP Nelsan), so I’ll never regret the time I spent in Bon Temps. Turns out, it could have been a lot worse! TB creator Alan Ball spoke about the show on the occasion of its 10th anniversary and revealed that Vampire Beehl was almost played by an alien. Sadly/thankfully, the world was robbed of its opportunity to see Benedict Cumberbatch’s cumberbiscuits when the role of Bill Compton went to Stephen Moyer instead.
Well, there’s at least one ray of light in the ongoing battle for Sofia Vergara and Nick Loeb’s frozen embryos. According to “sources” close to Sofia, Nick is still holding on to those frost-bitten “babies” in an attempt to break up her marriage with Joe Manganiello, which means if he’s successful, my chances of going to the bone zone with Joe go from 1/10000000.1 to 1/10000000.01. So, slightly better!
When 29-year-old Colton Haynes got engaged to his 46-year-old flower daddy Jeff Leatham (he’s a floral designer), it was a big, gay extravaganza complete with fireworks, drama and an appearance by Cher. So when I heard they were getting married this weekend, I prepared to explode into a tornado of glitter from the glorious gayness of their wedding. I expected to see Barbra Streisand softly yodel out Evergreen while officiating their ceremony from a giant crystal swan covered with rhinestone-encrusted white orchids imported from Thailand. But I guess all their money was spent on the engagement ceremony, because they had to settle for Pimp Mama Kris as their officiant.