Category: BABIES!!!
Lindsay Lohan Announced She’s Pregnant With Her First Child
The children of Moscow can rest easy tonight knowing that alleged attempted child napper Lindsay Lohan is pregnant with a child of her own. She has announced that she’s expecting her first child with her husband, Bader Shammas. Lindsay’s come a long way since those dark times, and people are asking, “is this a sign that a glorious new day is upon us?” As we know from our scriptures, no Lohanaissance is complete until five things occur, kinda like the seven seals of the apocalypse but more festive, and there are only five. They are as follows:
Keke Palmer Has Given Birth To A Baby Boy And The Reviews About His Name Are Mixed
We are all officially old as hell because Keke Palmer, who I still think of as the spelling champ cutie from Akeelah and the Bee, is not only turning thirty this year, she also gave birth to her first child over the weekend. Please pass me the Metamucil and vodka so I can toast to this happy occasion. And of course, there were a few who were disappointed about Keke and her man Darius Jackson‘s decision to name their newborn son Leodis Andrellton Jackson. But hit back.
Blake Lively And Ryan Reynolds Welcomed Their Fourth Child
Up until recently, professional pretty people Blake Lively and Ryan Reynolds had three daughters together: Betty, 3, Inez, 6, and James, 8. In my opinion, three is enough. You have a backup in case the first one’s a little shit, and a backup for the backup. But I guess Blake and Ryan are really into populating the world with mini versions of themselves, cuz People reports Blake has given birth to their fourth child. I didn’t know she was pregnant (coming to TLC this spring).
Rihanna Introduced A Very Special Guest During Her Super Bowl Halftime Performance: The Second Child She’s Pregnant With!
The highly anticipated Rihanna “comeback” concert, which took place during something called the Super Bowl (ever heard of it), was met with mixed reviews from her fans. Some were delighted to see RiRi barely move and stare into the camera like, “This is what you wanted, right?” because she gave us everything and nothing all at the same time. Classic RiRi. However, this time it had nothing to do with the fact she didn’t want to be there. The real reason she looked like she was over it at certain points during her performance is that she’s probably tired from carrying her second baby friend inside of her billion-dollar belly. And she chose the Halftime show to make the announcement as she “sang” some of her most beloved tracks in what will go down in history as the most epic episode of Lip Sync Battle ever.
Adam Levine And Behati Prinsloo Welcomed The Baby Adam Wanted To Name After His Alleged Side Piece
People reports that Adam Levine and Behati Prinsloo recently welcomed their third baby. The couple also share daughters, Gio Grace, 4, and Dusty Rose, 6. Adam and Behati have yet to reveal their newborn’s name, but something tells me if it’s a boy, they’re probably not going to go with Adam’s initial choice, “Sumner.” In case you forgot, last September, Adam’s alleged ex-sidepiece, 23-year-old Sumner Stroh, claimed he messaged her asking if she was OK with him naming his unborn child “Sumner” if it was a boy. Adam denied he and Sumner had a physical affair, but admitted he “crossed the line” with the flirty DMs. Unfortunately for him, after Sidepiece-Sumner’s allegations, several other women came forward with their own “Adam Levine is a cheater” stories. Well, maybe Adam and Behati named the baby after one of them…
Paris Hilton Announced That She And Carter Reum Welcomed A Baby
When Kathy Hilton said too much about Paris Hilton’s difficult fertility journey back in November, Paris quickly grabbed the mic from her simpleminded mom and clarified that she and her husband, Carter Reum, both 41, planned to enjoy their first year of marriage before cooking up one of their IVF embryos in 2023. And here we are! 2023 has only barely kicked in the door (although this January feels like it’s never going to end), and just like she promised, Paris and Carter have a new baby, and it’s a boy!