People Magazine’s least sexy Sexist Man Alive, Blake Shelton, offered his ex-wife Miranda Lambert some subtle front porch country shade (with a side of extra tart lemonade) when asked about her recent marriage to the “love of her life”, 28-year old NYPD cop Brendan McLoughlin. Brendan and Miranda have only been married for less than a month which, frankly, is longer than a lot of people probably expected. They’ve only known each other 3 months and he has an infant child with a woman his ex-fiance’s mom claims he cheated with. According to People, Blake’s been reduced to speaking only in country music cliches, a source claims “he put Miranda in his rear view mirror long ago”, presumably followed by something about dirt roads, Chevy trucks, and his dog riding shotgun (Gwen has to ride in the back).
I guess since the hype has died down after Kim Kardashian wore a dress from the Medieval Harlot Nuns collection this past weekend, her attention meter was almost at zero, so she needed something else to whine about. Kim took to Twitter to complain about THOT uniform emporium Fashion Nova and their incessant need to reproduce knockoffs of high end fashion houses. That’s ironic coming from Kim, who’s been the leading Paris Hilton knockoff since 2006.
Duchess Meghan enjoyed a dinner at Ralph Lauren’s Polo Bar restaurant last night following day one of her tacky two-day American baby shower hosted by her tacky American friends. I’m surprised they still had an appetite after a playing the “Name That Poop” melted candy bar in a diaper game but they somehow still managed to dine. Joining Meghan at dinner was good friend Serena Williams who also attended the first shower. According to The Cut, Meghan’s surprise trip to New York City is winding down and she’s expected to leave the city today after her second show and probably after making a pit stop at a bodega for a sack full of bacon egg and cheese sammies for the plane.
Oh I’m sure Kris Jenner is loving every messy moment of this story. She probably got a lady boner and heard the coins piling up in her bank account after discovering her daughter Khloe Kardashian is now filled with pain and sadness. The bad news is that the man Khloe chose to make a baby with, NBA player Tristan Thompson, has allegedly dribbled his balls into a different court belonging to Jordyn Woods, who is not only a former model for Khloe’s clothing line Good American but is also the best friend of her youngest sister Kylie Jenner. This totally real love triangle arrives just in time for the new season of Krapping Up The Kartrashians.
Us Weekly and Radar both posted pictures of bodybuilding Housewife of New Jersey, Teresa Giudice, –gasp–holding hands with a boy at a party with her husband Juicy Joe sits in a prison cell! All that glamour just cannot be contained by one man! Someone get the brand! We need to put a scarlet A on this trick ASAP!
That was fast. It was only a week ago that we posted about how Blac Chyna was humping on a new boy, Soulja Boy, specifically. And now they’re most likely done. They must’ve had one of those extra short contracts. Continue reading