Sherri Shepherd is currently enjoying her reign as the new Queen of Daytime Talk. Ok, she isn’t necessarily the “Queen.” Or even close. But whatever, after Debmar Mercury yanked former Queen of talk Wendy Williams from the show and tossed Sherri into the hot seat with a new coat of paint on the walls, she’s doing whatever she can to keep the lights on. And recently, she interviewed the legendary Marlo Thomas, who admitted she and Sherri go way back. Marlo remembers a time before Sherri’s weight loss journey began, but instead of simply reminding her, Marlo did an impersonation that was more suited as a tribute to Eddie Murphy in The Nutty Professor. And Sherri’s staff apparently didn’t take too kindly to Marlo’s gentle reminder.

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Anyone who’s been a celebrity gossip connoisseur since the early aughts is familiar with the conflagrant wreck that was Lindsay Lohan. Whether it was beefing with Brandon “Lindsay Lohan is a Fire Crotch” Davis and Paris Hilton or quarreling with her “friend” Samantha Ronson, Lindsay was always reliably stationed at the corner of “Hot Mess” and “Not This Shit Again.” Despite that, Lindsay said during her interview for the cover of Cosmopolitan that she wishes social media was around back in the earlier parts of her career so that she could have better controlled her own narrative. And the whole internet collectively sighed, “ohhhh, honey.” She also touched on all of her recent work and her unlikely friendship with Al Pacino.

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Now that Mariah Carey has given us all the thumbs up to start our Christmas shopping, Gwyneth Paltrow and Goop have burped up their gift list. And since this is Goopy Paltrow we’re talking about, it’s, of course, filled with ridiculous shit, like a BDSM chair that costs as much as a Toyota Prius. But if you’re into masochism, save yourself the $28k and just read any article on Goop. Instant pain and cringe! Now, most people outside of Gwyneth’s tax bracket will be receiving well wishes and Dollar Tree greeting cards. But in her mind, inflation is just a four-letter word created to keep the unfortunate exempt from the luxury she’s accustomed to. And once you take a look at her list of suggested holiday items, you’ll wonder why Santa didn’t shove the gift of common sense into her stocking last year.

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Cristiano Piquet, the paraglider who spotted an injured lady in need and helped save her!

The Miami Herald says that Cristiano Piquet, who is a realtor and owner of Piquet Realty, was out paragliding with a friend through Miami-Dade County on Sunday morning when he flew into a Woman Down Code 10 situation. Cristiano spotted a woman in the canal, and no, she wasn’t going for a leisurely Sunday morning swim in alligator-infested waters. The woman was left busted up and shocked after she somehow crashed her car into the canal and couldn’t get out. Cristiano immediately went into Captain Save-A-Ho mode, and he and his friend, made an emergency landing to help the woman out. And now she’s recovering from her injuries thanks to Cristiano’s heroic move. It’s a bird, it’s a plane, no, it’s a paragliding Florida realtor!

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Little-known indie artist Taylor Swift has announced that she’s going on a world tour next year. In more Tay Tay news, songs from her record-breaking album Midnights currently make up the entire Top 10 of Billboard’s Hot 100 chart. Tay Tay is the first artist to do that, and it’s also the first time that a dude has never been in the Top 10 of the Hot 100 chart. And if performances in a tweet could win Oscars, Tay Tay would win one since she pretended to be OMGSOSURPRISED about her new Billboard record on Twitter. Please, Tay Tay made several versions of the album because she knew her devoted Swifties would buy them all up, and she probably made her cats stream Midnights on a loop. So, Olivia Benson, Meredith Grey, and Benjamin Button, you can stop streaming your human’s album now; your mission has been accomplished!  – Complex

Professional oversharer Dax Shepard says that he and his wife/partner in TMI, Kristen Bell, really didn’t want a second child. But they agreed to have one so that their “spoiled bitch” oldest child (Dax’s words, not mine) could have a playmate and would learn to share. Something tells me that Dax and Kristen’s daughters have already learned to share. Specifically, they share the embarrassment of their parents refusing to STFU about them – Celebitchy

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