Category: Mackenzie Scott
Mackenzie Scott Donated $85 Million To Girl Scouts Of The USA, Breaking A Record
Going through a divorce can be stressful, so I can understand why MacKenzie Scott might be hoarding boxes of Samoas and Thin Mints in her freezer, but with $84.5 million dollars worth of cookies, she’s gonna need an entire temperature-controlled warehouse to store them. Of course, by my logic, that means that MacKenzie was hoarding lesbians, Black people, affordable housing, and icebergs in the wake of her divorce from Jeff Bezos, so maybe Mackenzie just made the single largest individual donation to Girl Scouts of the USA because she cares.
MacKenzie Scott Donated $436 Million To Habitat For Humanity
MacKenzie Scott is continuing to donate large chunks of her fortune to good causes while her billionaire ex-husband Jeff Bezos sends celebrities to space on his dick rocket and causes bridges to be taken apart so that his $500 million superyacht can get to him. Most recently, MacKenzie donated $2.74 billion to arts programs that help combat racism, and now she’s donated $436 million to Habitat for Humanity so they can help boost affordable housing and Black homeownership.
As MacKenzie Scott Smirks, Jeff Bezos Donated $100 Million Each To José Andrés And Van Jones
Yesterday, two dicks stuck their tips into space a bit (“They did?! I hardly felt it.” – space). Jeff Bezos and his circumcised dick rocket launched into suborbital space and spent three quick minutes there before coming down to earth, although, I think it’s impossible for Jeff Bezos to really ever be down to earth. You would think that everybody would have nothing but good things to say about the richest human on Earth spending $5 billion to take a billionaire joy ride to space while Amazon drivers have to shit in bags and the planet burns. But people dragged Jeff and they really dragged him when he smugly thanked Amazon employees and customers for making his Make A Wish: Billionaire Edition dreams come true. Jeff made it all okay, though, by announcing that he is giving a total of $200 million to philanthropic chef José Andrés and Kim Kartrashian’s mentor and rumored piece Van Jones for them to donate to non-profits of their choice. Sure, earlier in the day, Jeff Bezos probably also “donated” millions to the gold toilet he pissed in since one of his piss streams is worth at least $10 million, but hey!
Mackenzie Scott Has Given Away Another $2.74 Billion Right Here On Earth
While her ex-husband Jeff Bezos proceeds to ignite barrels of cash so he can shoot himself into space and finally achieve his childhood dream of playing 7 Minutes in Heaven without the humiliation of waiting in a dark closet for an hour only to come out and find the party had moved to a cooler kid’s house, MacKenzie Scott continues to ensure an eternity in heaven by fulfilling her promise to give away her entire fortune. CNN Business reports that Mack and her new husband Dan Jewett just made a $2.74 billion donation “to organizations that focus on the arts and combating racial discrimination,” bringing Mack’s total giving up to $8.5 billion in under a year. While Jeff has his eye on the stars, Mack’s looking out for humanity right here on earth — and both of hers work!
Mackenzie Scott Married A Science Teacher From Her Kids’ Private High School
A high school science teacher just won the lottery and he didn’t even have to buy a ticket. TMZ reports that Dan Jewett, a science teacher at the bougie Seattle Lakeside school, recently got married to a mom at the school who also happens to be billionaire philanthropist and ex-wife of Jeff Bezos, Mackenzie Scott. Now before you go calling Dan a gold digger and start scouring his Insta to see how much work he’s had done in order to land such a big fish, please know he’s already signed a good karma prenup and vowed to give all his wife’s money away.
Mackenzie Scott Gave Away Another $4.2 Billion Dollars
Nope, that wasn’t an earthquake you felt, that was Jeff Bezos’ left eye twitching with such force, ripples were felt as far away as Japan. Proving once again that yes, you can just do that, Jeff’s ex-wife MacKenzie Scott just gave away $4 billion dollars. This follows the $1.7 billion in donations that she gave away in July. Jeff’s so shook he shook us!