Category: JLo
Open Post: Hosted By The Boston Red Sox Letting Jennifer Lopez Know That They Missed Her
Ben Affleck loves all things Boston, like his beloved major league baseball team, the Boston Red Sox. And now that Ben might have Jennifer Lopez back in his life, the Boston Red Sox are joyfully declaring their everlasting love for JLo in a TikTok video. And sure, they’re probably also trolling Alex Rodriguez, just a little.
Alex Rodriguez Has Gotten Too “Needy” For Jennifer Lopez, And She Cut Him Off
Ever since Jennifer Lopez and Alex Rodriguez announced they were splitting up and ending their engagement, A-Rod has been living his life like it’s the third act of a romantic comedy. You know, the part where the guy is desperate to win the love of his life back from the bad boy hunk with questionable intentions? A-Rod has tried everything to woo JLo back into his chemically plumped arms, from eating food together to thinking good thoughts about it. JLo clearly isn’t as interested in going back to A-Rod. Even if she didn’t maybe already have Ben Affleck back in her life, she allegedly wants nothing to do with how desperate A-Rod has been acting. Jenny from the block is now Jenny who will block your calls.
Jennifer Lopez’s Former Publicist Thinks She Kept Her Demure Pink Diamond Engagement Ring From Ben Affleck
We’re entering week three of Operation: Revive Bennifer, and if you’ve recently complained about how tired your ass is, then stop it, because you have no idea! Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck’s PR teams have been mainlining Red Bull and duct-taping their eyelids open because STUNT QUEEN-ing never sleeps and they’ve been working overtime and then some. We’ve already heard that Bennifer took their reunion tour to Montana and that Ben began wooing JLo back in February with emails of pure romance. One “source” claimed that JLo was reminded how Ben “owns her heart with his pen” (not a typo, I meant “pen” and not “peen“). So whichever PR intern came up with that line of poetry is obviously the reincarnation of Shakespeare! Not only does it seem like JLo’s current PR team is working hard for her, but even her former publicists are also working it hard. Rob Shuter, who was JLo’s publicist during Bennifer’s origin run, isn’t surprised that they’re hanging out again and also believes that JLo held onto the pink diamond engagement ring that Ben gave her.
Jennifer Lopez And Ben Affleck Hung Out, But They’re Just Friends, Okay!?
While Alex Rodriguez cries out tears of sorrow onto the rock-hard cum gutters of a muscled-up blond fitness influencer, Jennifer Lopez is wasting no time in getting back to the business of pulling stunts for show. When the true love kingdom of J-Rod crumbled from the weight of his rogue dick, many prayed to the Gossip Gods to reunite JLo with one of her exes. Casper Smart probably took one look at his checking account balance and prayed it would be him, but lovers of messiness tried to manifest either the return of Diddy and JLo or Bennifer 1.0! Well, JLo (seen above in 2003 proving that the real fountain of youth isn’t olive oil, it’s frosted Wet ‘N Wild eyeshadow) and Ben Affleck’s PR teams heard your payers because Ben was papped going into JLo’s house several times (not a euphemism, I think). I see JLo trying to show that amateur PR whore Ana de Armas how it’s really done!
Alex Rodriguez Might Be Trying To Get Back Together With Jennifer Lopez
When Jennifer Lopez and Alex Rodriguez officially called it quits a few weeks ago, I naturally assumed that both parties decided to call it quits after coming to the conclusion that it just couldn’t work out, due to JLo finally realizing that she could not change A-Rod’s allegedly unfaithful-seeming ways. When someone shows you who they are, believe their cheating ass. But while JLo is rumored to be ready to move on from this breakup more quickly than she moved on from the #LoveDontCostAThingChallenge, it sounds like A-Rod thinks their breakup could be temporary and might be plotting to win JLo back.
Jennifer Lopez And Alex Rodriguez Were Seen Out To Dinner Together
After officially calling things off a little over a week ago, Jennifer Lopez and Alex Rodriguez continue to toy with our fragile, edge-dwelling emotions by keeping us guessing as to their relationship status and fixating on the next update. This is how you stunt-queen like a pro, kids! Even when you’re not really together anymore, the partnership may have vexingly taken on a life of its own and needs propping up here and there, especially when there is money involved. At least be friendly and civil, so everyone can feel good about supporting your brand.
After the totally surprising and not at all predictable revelation that maybe JLo wasn’t impressed at the thought of sharing A-Rod’s chronically roving peen with side pieces, the demise of the hottest romance of our generation may have deflated all of our aspirations, but we now have a blueprint for how to stay friendly when there are cameras around after fate has dealt its cruel blow.