Ronda Rousey Took A Trip To The Hospital After Her Fight Last Night
I should clarify; that makes it sound like Ronda Rousey was like “I want to celebrate a fight well fought by taking a trip to the hospital. Maybe they’ll give me a tour of the X-ray room?” No, Ronda Rousey took the way less fun kind of trip to the hospital.
So last night, full-time MMA fighter and part-time Floyd Mayweather Jr. dragger Ronda Rousey fought another MMA fighter named Holly Holm in Australia. From what I know about MMA fighting (ie: what I learned from the 1985 film Gymkata), it is my understanding that Ronda Rousey is good at her job. Well, nobody’s good at their job all the time, and according to TMZ, she got knocked the fuck out in the second round. Unfortunately, it was the kind of knockout that made everyone start whispering “shit shit shit, she has travel insurance, right?“, and about two seconds after they rang the bell, an ambulance hauled Ronda Rousey’s ass to the hospital.
TMZ says Ronda didn’t speak to the press after the fight, but a rep for UFC released a statement on her behalf saying that she was taken to the hospital as a precautionary measure. TMZ says Ronda didn’t have a concussion, but she had a huge gash in the middle of her lip and she was kept overnight in the hospital. They also have some pictures (not safe for people who get the heaves at the sight of blood) of Ronda Rousey’s busted face, if that’s something you want to see.
Now let’s add a layer off random to this story, shall we? Shortly after Ronda was knocked out, Lady Gaga grabbed her disco stick and started poking at Ronda on Instagram.
According to TMZ, Ronda has been catching shit for not touching gloves with Holly before their fight. Don’t worry; once the morphine haze wears off, I’m sure Ronda will return the read.
Here’s Ronda Rousey and Holly Holm (whose names totally sound like they were created by Stan Lee) a few days before their fight at an open training session in Melbourne.
Pics: Splash
SNL Opened Last Night’s Show With A Tribute To Paris
Even though my brain was still cursing my ass out for making it watch soggy Ritz cracker Donald Trump struggle to read off cue cards last week, I watched Saturday Night Live last night. Mostly because I was hoping they’d open with a sketch showing that last week’s show was just an elaborate 90-minute long prank pulled by Gilly. Instead, they kept it classy by scrapping their usual cold open and replacing it with Cecily Strong acknowledging Friday’s events in Paris. It’s short and sweet and she even does the second half in French, which is pretty impressive (well, to me, at least – but that’s because I can barely order a cheeseburger in French without going “Um…uh…le…um…“). She must have gotten a few pronunciation lessons from Jean K. Jean or something.
They still did a whole show, of course, and I’ve thrown two of the funnier sketches after the cut.
Rob Lowe Is Taking Shit For A Bunch Of Tweets He Made After The Attacks In Paris
“Siri, how many people are pissed at me right now? That many? Oh crap…”
Shortly after the horrible, awful attacks in Paris happened on Friday night, pretty much every famous person took to Facebook and Instagram and Twitter and Snapchat and that thing Madonna was trying to make happen (Meerkat?) and filled it with their thoughts and prayers and #PrayForParis hashtags and red-white-and-blue. Of course, there has to be one person who makes a bunch of people cross their arms and shake their heads while saying “No…no…“, and that person was Rob Lowe.
Hot Slut Of The Day!
The Boss Bitch Pussy who is the Christian Grey to this dog’s Anastasia Steele (but without all that tampon and fucking stuff)!
In a truly thrilling video that I hope is turned into a riveting feature film full of twists and turns (SPOILER ALERT: It won’t, because those evil and stupid whores in Hollywood never give us the stories we want), Sammy the dog’s human keeps calling him and he tries to run over, but he can’t break free from the ginger master cat holding on to his leash. Sammy the Dog is the chariot to that cat’s Ben-Purr.
Sure, the cat’s claws could be stuck to that leash, but I’m going to choose to not believe that reasonable explanation, because I want to believe this leader pussy is purposely pulling the string of Sammy’s life.
Oh, Sammy, just stop fighting it and give in to your new pussy overlord!
via Tastefully Offensive and Buzzfeed
Birthday Sluts
Roberto Cavalli (75)
Shailene Woodley (24)
B.o.B (27)
Jeffree Starr (28)
Lily Aldridge (30)
Yaya DaCosta (33)
Leslie Hall (34)
Ace Young (35)
Sean Murray (38)
Virginie Ledoyen (39)
Chad Kroeger (41)
Sydney Tamiia Poitier (42)
Jonny Lee Miller (43)
Rachel True (49)
Judy Gold (53)
Kevin Eubanks (58)
Alexander O’Neal (62)
Beverly D’Angelo (64)
Jimmy Choo (67)
Frida Lyngstad of Abba (70)
Bob Gunton (70)
Sam Waterston (75)
Petula Clark (83)
Ed Asner (86)
Judge Joseph Wapner (96)
Pic: Robert Cavalli Blog
Open Post: Hosted By John Stamos Trying To Sneak Past A Fight
Not the face! Anything but the face!
So last night, John Stamos went out for dinner, and as he was leaving, he almost found himself in the middle of an angry dude three-way on the sidewalk. As far as I can tell, the dude in the red leather jacket (Yehya from Jimmy Kimmel Live, as many of you have pointed out) wanted a picture of Uncle Jesse and the guy in the hoodie is a pap, and clearly someone got in someone’s way. Obviously we’ll never know for sure why two dudes decided to go all Mortal Kombat in front of John Stamos, but here’s what I think happened: As John Stamos was exiting the restaurant, those two dudes caught a whiff of Uncle Jesse’s sexy pheromones, and like two alley cats smelling the stank off a can of tuna, they went crazy and started fighting over him. Those foolish men; pounding on each other is no way to John Stamos’ heart. Uncle Jesse is a lover, not a fighter.
Here’s more of John Stamos with his “dinner date” (the photo agency didn’t recognize it was Johnny Knoxville. SHADE) trying not to get whooped last night.
Pics: Splash