Donald Trump Was A Mess On SNL Last Night (Shocking, I Know)

November 8, 2015 / Posted by:

Because I don’t love myself (and also because I misplaced my memory stick containing all 8 episodes of Anchorwoman), I watched Presidential hopeful Donald Trump host Saturday Night Live last night. And I’m sure if you also made the mistake of watching, there’s a 100% chance you’re yelling “Oh my god, that goddamn laser harp sketch” at your screen right now. Because yeah, that goddamn laser harp sketch. I still can’t with that laser harp sketch. I swear to god, about 3 seconds into that laser harp sketch, I started praying that one of those lasers would magically shoot into my brain and wipe away the memory of watching Donald Trump try to act.

To be honest, I was expecting more of a shit-show than what we actually got. Sadly, what we actually got was 12 minutes of Donald Trump squinting at the cue-cards like a near-sighted rotten circus peanut that pretty much everyone hated. We also got Larry David (who came back to do Bernie Sanders better than the real Bernie Sanders does Bernie Sanders) calling Donald Trump a “racist from the audience, but because Lorne Michaels is trolling at an expert level (see: having Donald Trump host), there’s a 99.99999999% chance that was a staged bit. But other than that, my brain was hating me every moment I didn’t reach for the remote and search for a rerun of Pick A Puppy.

But in the event you’re not totally over Hotline Bling parodies, then I have some good news: they did parody Drake’s dad-dancing in the Hotline Bling video.

Yes, that was Martin Short as Ed Grimley making an appearance at the 1:13 mark, which honestly was just about the most infuriating part of the whole night. You mean to tell me they had life legend Martin Short there the whole time, and they went with Donald Trump??? If they were really that hard up for a smarmy dude with weird-looking fluffy white hair to host the show, I’m sure Martin Short would have gladly pulled his old Jackie Rogers Jr. wig out of storage and stuck around.

Here’s more of Donald Trump (you’re like “Yeah, nobody asked for more Donald Trump“) leaving the SNL afterparty last night, as well as musical guest Sia, Larry David, Bill O’Reilly, and Donald’s “third wife” (copyright: Ivana Trump) Melania.

Pics: NBC, Splash

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