Chris Evans Is People’s Sexiest Man Alive Of 2022
To many, Chris Evans is considered their Best Chris (and yes, those people obviously don’t know about the piping hot total package that is Christopher Lloyd). And last night, People Magazine declared that not only do they think that Chris Evans is the sexiest man with a pulse named Chris, but he’s also the sexiest man of all sexiest men alive. So, somewhere Chris Evans’ publicist is soothing their worn-out muscles in a BenGay bath after successfully winning a wrestling tournament in People’s offices against the other publicists who wanted to win this totally real title for their client. Sorry, Austin Butler’s rep, do your chin-ups and pull-ups, and you’ll beat those tricks next year.
While Chris Evans being named this year’s Sexiest Man Alive, may make some people ask, “When we turned back the clocks on Sunday, did we turn them all the way back to 2019?“, this choice being three years late doesn’t bother me. But what does bother me is that People put Chris Evans on the cover of their Sexiest Man Alive issue and didn’t feature the best thing about him, his dog DODGER EVANS! Journalistic integrity: People Magazine has none!
Millie Bobby Brown Said She’d Love To Take On The Role Of Britney Spears If There’s Ever A Biopic Made About Her
At just 18 years old, Millie Bobby Brown is already an industry veteran. She found fame at the tender age of 12 as Eleven on Stranger Things and has been in the public (and creepy Drake’s) eye ever since. She even co-produced her most recent Netflix original film, Enola Holmes 2, which she’s currently promoting. Millie just appeared on The Drew Barrymore Show and shared which career move she’d love to make that she’s yet to accomplish: playing the role of a real person. And according to Millie, she’d really do Britney Spears justice if she were to be cast as her in a hypothetical biopic. And it looks like she’s already really leaning into manifesting this since she’s been rocking the messy artificial blonde weave as of late.
Hot Slut Of The Day!
Darcie, the escape artist dachshund!
One day, Mary Warwick of Burbidge, Leicestershire, England, came home to find her one-year-old dachshund, Darcie, peeking at her from the window. That made Mary do a double-take because Darcie was supposed to be in the kitchen with her dog siblings. Mary made sure her doggy friends wouldn’t bust out by putting up a baby gate. When Darcie kept getting out, Mary decided to get to the bottom of The Curious Case Of Escapin’ Darcie by setting up a camera in the kitchen. That led to Mary cracking the case. So was Darcie spreading her wiener ears and flying to the other side of the wall? Is Darice the Simone Biles of dachshunds, and she gracefully lept over that barrier? No, Darcie got over the gate by using her bulldog brother Benson as a step stool!
Birthday Sluts
Lauren Alaina (28)
Riker Lynch (31)
SZA (32)
Jessica Lowndes (34)
Erica Mena (35)
Jack Osbourne (37)
Sam Sparro (40)
Azura Skye (41)
Laura Jane Grace (42)
Dania Ramirez (43)
Bucky Covington (45)
Khia (45)
Tara Reid (47)
Matthew Rhys (48)
David Muir (49)
Gretchen Mol (50)
Tech N9ne (51)
Pic: MySpace
Kamar de los Reyes (55)
Courtney Thorne-Smith (55)
Gordon Ramsay (56)
Leif Garrett (61)
Chi Chi LaRue (63)
Richard Curtis (66)
Rickie Lee Jones (68)
Christie Hefner (70)
Alfre Woodard (70)
Mary Hart (72)
Bonnie Raitt (73)
Alain Delon (87)
Minnie Riperton (1947-1979)
Morley Safer (1931-2016)
Esther Rolle (1920-1998)
Margaret Mitchell (1900-1949)
Bram Stoker (1847-1912)
Night Crumbs
While I not-so-patiently wait for Netflix to finally announce a second season of Mindhunter, they have announced that two Ryan Murphy joints, Monster and The Watcher, have been renewed. Monster has actually been renewed for two more seasons. The first season, of course, covered Dahmer, but the second and third seasons will cover two different psychopaths, so Ryan and Netflix may anger even more family members of serial killer victims. As for The Watcher, it’s unknown whether its second season will be a continuation of the first or a whole new story. If it’s picking up from season one, that’s great news for the makers of monochromatic neutrals! Yes, that show needs a second season as much as I need another hangover, but maybe in the second season, we’ll finally find out that (SPOILER ALERT) The Watcher is really a J. Crew designer who is stalking the family for design inspo – TVLine
Los Angeles mayoral candidate, billionaire Rick Caruso, has won the highly important Chris Pratt endorsement. But whatever, Rick doesn’t need that shit since he’s already got an endorsement from true A-list superstar Dean Cain – Lainey Gossip
John Mayer And Kiernan Shipka May Have Gone On A Romantic Dinner Date Together
The Daily Mail is reporting that John Mayer and Kiernan Shipka went on a romantic, four-hour dinner date last night at Giorgio Baldi in Santa Monica last night. At one point, witnesses claim 45-year-old John serenaded 22-year-old Kiernan with a song. Dear god, that’s his mating call! Say it with me, everyone: “Get your filthy slut paws off of Sally Draper!”