Cats vs. dogs. Cats vs. mice. Cats vs. cats. Cats vs. you any time you don’t feed them at the exact second they’re hungry. Yes, cats have many, MANY nemeses. Just look at one sideways, and you’ve made an enemy for life. That’s what a raccoon recently experienced when scavenging for food around a home in Canada. Rather than coming across a tipped-over trash can with half-eaten Hungry Man meals inside, the raccoon came face to face with Lily, the feline ruler of the house. Only a glass door stood between the two foes. Who won the dramatic standoff? (The cat, obviously).

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For a golfer, Tiger Woods has the drama-filled life of a Vanderpump Rules mess. In addition to his very famous breakup with ex-wife Elin Nordegren over a decade ago, Tiger has kept his name in the news thanks to pills, Trump, a very dramatic car accident caused by Tiger’s lead foot, and most recently, a “prank” involving a tampon. Now, he’s gotten into some legal problems with his ex-girlfriend Erica Herman who claims that he kicked her out of the house despite having come to an “oral agreement” that said differently. You’d hope after Elin, he would’ve learned to keep his love life as boring as the game of golf, but I guess he lives for drama!

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When we last left the cheating lovebirds, formerly of Good Morning America, they had successfully negotiated their exit, took the money, and ran off to let their organic love bloom. But while Amy Robach and TJ Holmes no longer have to keep their love confined to hotel rooms and ABC News’ supplies closets, they are both going through a divorce. Amy filed for divorce from her husband of 12 years, Andrew Shue in December, the same month that TJ filed for divorce from his wife of 12 years, Marilee Fiebig. Now sources are telling Us Weekly that Amy and TJ have apparently decided to complicate things further by possibly getting engaged and moving in together. Because what could go wrong?!

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One of Jenna Ortega’s life goals must be to appear on as many lunchboxes and t-shirts at Hot Topic as possible because she’s in talks to star in Tim Burton’s sequel to Beetlejuice after working with him on Wednesday for Netflix. Tim is expected to direct, and Michael Keaton will be back too. If Jenna signs on, she’ll solidify herself as the Gen Z Winona Ryder because she’ll play Lydia Deetz’s daughter. And if Tim continues to work with Jenna, then she’ll officially replace Johnny Depp as his muse. So I’m guessing that right now, Johnny Depp is in front of Tim Burton’s house in a gothy babydoll dress and a little spiky wig, begging Tim to please, please, please cast him as Lydia Deetz, Jr.! – Just Jared

While some call Glenn Close the Susan Lucci of the Oscars since she has eight nominations and zero wins, the Susan Lucci of the Oscars might really be Diane Warren. She’s been nominated 14 times and does not have a little naked gold dude on her shelf. And honestly, those who didn’t vote for her to win the Best Song Oscar for Nothing’s Gonna Stop Us Now from Mannequin should be jailed! – Pajiba

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It would make sense for Cher’s sons, 54-year-old Chaz Bono and 46-year-old Elijah Blue Allman, to be wary of 37-year-old music producer, Alexander “AE” Edwards “Bang Bang”-ing their 76-year-old mom. But, even though there were recent rumors that Chaz and Elijah were worried about AE weaseling his way into their future fat pockets and didn’t approve of him and Cher possibly getting ready to elope despite the familial conflict, AE recently said that all of the adults get along and Cher’s even met his 3-year-old son. We can also all look forward to AE and Cher making sweet, sweet music together (and not just in the way that a cougar would describe doing the do with her much younger piece when gushing about it at her book club), because Cher said he gave her some of the songs that’ll be on her two upcoming albums.

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