Category: Hoda Kotb

Mel B Is Still Insisting The Spice Girls Are Reuniting

June 27, 2018 / Posted by:

Because divorce lawyers don’t come cheap, Mel B still has her fangs sunk into the idea of the Spice Girls getting back together for easy money since there are people like me who’d see they are coming to town and think, “Eh, why not?” If a nuclear war were to ever happen, and LAWD knows it looks like it might, I’m pretty sure the only thing left would be Scary Spice insisting the Spice Girls are days from launching a reunion tour. That’s why when she was the guest co-host of the fourth hour of Today this morning, she blabbed about how she and the other four – Victoria Beckham included – will be going on tour soon. Sure, Jan. Continue reading

Cate Blanchett And Sarah Paulson Lost It On “Today” This Morning

June 5, 2018 / Posted by:

Reboot-a-palooza continues on the silver screen this summer with the upcoming Ocean’s 8, a lady-led spinoff of Ocean’s 11. The film drops this Friday, and co-stars Cate Blanchett and Sarah Paulson dropped by Today this morning to promote it. Their snarky banter, laying their awards dicks on the table, and mom jokes made Hoda Kotb laugh so hard that her co-host Savannah Guthrie had to come out and help her finish the interview. At least, that’s what they’re saying, but I think Hoda was crying over lack of job security since Cate and Sarah were twice as messed in the head as she normally is during the fifteenth hour with Kathie Lee Gifford. Continue reading

Burt Reynolds Explains What He Meant To Say On “Today”

March 23, 2018 / Posted by:

If it looks like a doddering old pepaw, and makes weird, questionable remarks like a doddering old pepaw, then guess what. It’s a doddering old peeaw! That’s the lesson learned from Burt Reynolds’ attempt to explain his say what now?” comments to Hoda Kotb on Today about her purdy mouth and his love of a 7-year-old Sally Field who he didn’t actually meet until she was 31.

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Burt Reynolds Fell In Love With Sally Field When She Was 7

March 15, 2018 / Posted by:

Burt Reynolds is 82 years old. Some people in their 80s are still sharper than the spines on a cat’s dick and have got the energy of youngins a third of their age (see: Rita Moreno and Jane Fonda). But other people in their 80s, have the energy of a corpse that’s been reanimated using half-depleted AA batteries found in your grandma’s freezer, and say weird shit. Burt Reynolds falls into the second category.

Burt was on Today this morning, and when he wasn’t becoming Subway Jared’s new favorite actor, he was hypnotized by Hoda Kotb’s anti-Brielle Bermann lips.

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Open Post: Hosted By Rita Ora Giving You Intergalactic Bordello Madam

January 28, 2018 / Posted by:

When you’re a question mark’s favorite pop singer and people regularly mistake you for the wall, you have to pull some shit to make people pay attention to you. Like dress yourself up as a Miss Kitty from the future who just got jumped by a gang of silkie chickens.

Clive Davis threw his annual pre-Grammy party in NYC last night, and many of the guests decided to save their better dresses for tonight’s Grammys (although, they should really just wear pajamas with an attached pillow and duvet cover, because that shit is going to be three and a half fucking hours long). Because most of them wore boring dresses bought off the rack at Macy’s (Taryn Manning’s impact!), but not Rita Ora.

Rita Ora threw feathers, fringe, bows, rhinestone and whatever else that was on sale at Michael’s onto her body. Rita looks like she just came from auditioning for the Thandie Newton role in a no-budget unauthorized Public Access reboot of Westworld that takes place way off in the future and will eventually get shut down after HBO sues. Rita is also dressed like a look-for-less Kartrashian, which is saying a lot since the Kartrashians dress like look-for-less Kartrashians.

And here’s a million more pictures from Clive Davis’ party, including Kathie Lee Gifford (who I hope wins, via write-in vote, the Best Song Grammy tonight for He Saw Jesus) and Martha Stewart, whose dogs are probably nervous that she’s going to skin and wear their asses next.

Pics: Wenn.com

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