Azealia Banks has apparently put away the shank she waved in Iggy Azalea’s direction for years, and those two wrecks may have finally trashed their overcooked beef and made up. But as Azealia (temporarily) scratches Iggy’s name off of a list of enemies to cast a black magic spell on, Halsey has stood up and declared to the world that along with good taste and nice wigs, she wants nothing to do with Iggy Azalea.
Last week, a bench warrant was issued for Azealia Banks after she skipped out on a court appearance. Azealia was MIA for a hearing regarding her 2015 boob-biting incident because she was in Paris for Fashion Week. Part of me expected Azealia to cook up some kind of scheme to avoid an arrest, like faking her own death to throw off the police and laying low in an small French village under the assumed name Azealia de la Baguette. To my surprise, Azealia returned to New York and made good on her lawyer’s promise to take care of her latest legal mess.
We all know Azealia Banks has the ability to make a situation extremely messy, but apparently she can also cause heaps of trouble from thousands of miles away too. Apparently her witchcraft skills include remote viewing powers. Case in point, Azealia missing a court appearance because she was at a fashion show in Paris.
Former rapper turned professional troll Azealia Banks conjured up another ten dozen headlines with her name in ’em over the weekend when she went after another one of the popular kids. You gotta do what you gotta do to be relevant and Azealia did that by starting a fight with Rihanna. It led to the both of them leaking each other’s phone numbers.
Perma-troll Azealia Banks decided to cap off everyone’s dismal 2016 by Snapchatting evidence that she’s been sacrificing chickens in her home for several years under the auspices of religion. You can watch THAT authentic-looking mess here.
Here’s some good news that no doubt had Russell Crowe whipping a phone into the air while shouting “Hooray for me!” (I’m pretty sure he can’t not celebrate without throwing something).