Johnny Depp (52)
Mae Whitman (27)
Natalie Portman (34)
Matthew Bellamy (37)
Michaela Conlin (37)
Shandi Finnessey (37)
Ed Simons (45)
Tamela Mann (49)
Gloria Reuben (51)
Michael J. Fox (54)
Aaron Sorkin (54)
Patricia Cornwell (59)
Dick Vitale (76)
Jackie Mason (84)

In case you couldn’t tell by the way Carey Mulligan has been trying to hide the fetus growing in her baby-baking-area with awkward dresses, she’s got a fetus growing in her baby-baking-area – Popsugar

Leonardo DiCatchAHo is suing some French tabloid for saying that he put a baby in RiRi. Speaking of lawsuits, James Lipton, Clive Davis and Jack Nicholson should all sue Leonardo for stealing their look – Lainey Gossip

My thoughts and prayers are with Teresa Giudice who had to hand over her Maserati to the feds for all that grifting she did – Reality Tea

Salma Hayek’s magnificent chichis graced the Spike TV Guys’ Choice Awards with their presence – Drunken Stepfather

At the Tonys last night, Alan Cumming made a joke about boning Bradley Cooper and either he has the farts or he wasn’t amused – Towleroad

Oscar Pistorius will be released back into the wild after serving 10 months in prison. Well, that makes sense, because he only killed a person. It’s not like he did anything super, super serious, right? – Jezebel

Entourage is the Aloha of dudebro movies – The Superficial

Katy Perry either has a John Mayer love mark (aka a herp sore) on her mouth or somebody cut one – Popoholic

I’m surprised that the card this magician pulled out of his ass crack wasn’t a Queen of Farts – Hollywood Tuna

Speaking of cracks, Charlotte McKinney made sure everyone saw her’s at the Spike TV Guys’ Choice Awards – IDLYITW

Paris replaced all those locks of love with some Chris Brown-looking ass graffiti – The Berry 

Panty Creamer of the Day: Jai Courtney eye fucking the camera – Boy Culture

I knew this chick who only wore high heels and when she had to wear flats, she’d dramatically fall or pretend to dramatically fall. That’s totally going to be Barbie – OMG Blog

Mrs. Walsh from The Goonies and Gail from Lethal Weapon died last month – HuffPo

If this is really the title of Katy Perry’s Taylor Swift diss track, she truly kept it mysterious and subtle – ICYDK

Maybe Clint Eastwood wasn’t making a Caitlyn Jenner joke. Maybe Caitlyn Somebody is the name of the imaginary person in his chair – Just Jared

I can already hear my cousin, who sometimes reads Dlisted and has a tighter grip on the 80s than me, screaming at me, “PAUL LEKAKIS WAS ROOOOOBBED! YOU SHOULD’VE FIXED IT, BITCH!”

Paul Lekakis and the other Hot Slut of the Month finalists didn’t stand a chance against the Double Gay Rainbow that decorated the skies of Dublin and was captured by Twitter user @karltims on the day that Ireland voted to legalize same-sex marriage. The big gay rainbow and its big gay twin got 41% of the votes and their biggest competition was KFC Japan’s big-tittied chicken nugget mascot who got a little under 27% of the votes. I just re-read that last sentence and I want to thank all of you for making it possible for me to able to type out sentences like that. And yes, I typed it with a serious face. The naked political cowboy of Denmark got almost 25% of the votes and Paul Lekakis didn’t even get 10%. He got 7%. That is a direct slap to the 80s and to the beauty of one night stands.

The Double Gay Rainbow of Dublin will be back next year for the Hot Slut of the Year finals.

Thanks to everyone who voted!

Jazz yodeler and dog clothes designer Lady CaCa is currently on tour with Tony Bennett, and today they both performed for the apple of my brown eye Prince Hot Ginge at a fundraiser for WellChild at Royal Albert Hall in London. Never mind that Lady CaCa’s eyebrows look like unicorn herpes or that in her concert pics (in the gallery below) she looks like a klingon muppet in drag as Marilyn Monroe and last days Mae West, this may be the first (and only time) in history that I’ve looked at her and said, “Yes, yes, I would.” I’d totally butt hump Lady CaCa’s right hand and I’m only saying that because it touched PHG for a second. That’s really all it takes. I’d totally do CaCa’s claw right after I romanced that Dr. Who chick’s knee.

Pics: Wenn.com

For a very long time, whenever I saw a picture of Zoe Saldana and her hot hipster husband, I would just refer to him as “Zoe Saldana’s Hot Hipster Husband” or “Fabio of Williamsburg.” Eventually I learned that Zoe Saldana’s husband had a name, and it was Marco Perego. Now it looks like I’m going to have to take a dry cloth and wipe away the name “Perego” from the white board in my brain, because that’s not his name anymore. Zoe Saldana recently admitted during an interview with InStyle (via UsWeekly) that her husband decided to go by “Mr. Marco Saldana” ever since they made it legal two years ago.

“I tried to talk him out of it. I told him, ‘If you use my name, you’re going to be emasculated by your community of artists, by your Latin community of men, by the world.’ Marco looks up at me and says, ‘Ah, Zoe, I don’t give a shit.'”

I’m with Marco on this one. If you have the opportunity to take your name from fairly sexy to mucho sexo (Marco Saldana is a very sexy name), you should take it. And if anyone gives him stank eye because he took his wife’s last name, he can just be like “My name is Marco Saldana, your opinion is invalid.”

At least we know Marco did it for the right reasons. If Marco’s motivation for changing his name was to take advantage of his famous wife’s last name and get special treatment, he would have legally changed it to Marco Kit-from-Crossroads. Nothing says “Right this way, sir!” like letting people know you’re married to the third-billed star of one of the greatest movies ever made.

Almost three years ago, human jewel Tim Curry had a major stroke that left him in a bad way. Since then, humanity has been asking “Where the hell is Tim Curry to show these bitches how it’s really done?” and I think I asked that question out loud while watching Christopher Walken in NBC’s Peter Pan Live! Tim Curry has been laying low and recovering with the help of physical therapy. At last night’s Actors Fund Tony Awards Viewing Party in Los Angeles, Tim Curry rolled onto the red carpet to receive a lifetime achievement award for his contributions to making ass lips pucker by swishing, swaying and serving pure talent in Rocky Horror Picture Show, The Worst Witch, etc… etc…

Tim, who’s my favorite age (69), still has to use a wheelchair to get around, but he told Los Angeles Magazine during an interview about his lifetime achievement award from the Actors Fund that he’s doing okay.

Since your stroke you have made limited public appearances. How are you doing and are you looking forward to the Actors Fund event?
I’m doing well and I’m looking forward to it. I’ve done a few benefits for the Actors Fund and I think it’s a marvelous organization. I hope not to have to use it.

How important is your sense of humor to you?
Vital. Absolutely vital. It’s not tough to maintain. It is just part of my DNA.

When I woke up this morning, I saw all these headlines about how Tim Curry was honored at the Tonys. I drunkenly watched every single second of the Tonys (because as a gay dude who once lived in NYC I like to play a game of “Oh Shit, My Friend Totally Blew That One Chorus Boy In A Gay Bar Bathroom” while watching it) and I didn’t remember Tim Curry showing up at all. I almost looked up information for the nearest AA group, because I obviously have a problem if booze ate my memory of seeing a legend like Tim Curry at the Tonys. But after injecting coffee directly into my brain, I realized he was at a Tony viewing party. Tim should’ve been at the actual Tonys, though. They should’ve cut that ship wreck of a Finding Neverland performance and let Tim sing a Rocky Horror/Annie/The Worst Witch/Spamalot medley as he descended from above in his wheelchair. That’s what the Tonys needed.

Here’s a few more pictures of Tim Curry at the Actors Fund Tony Viewing Party. I also threw in a million pictures from the actual Tonys of Bernadette Peters, Chita Rivera and other Broadway legends like Gigi Hadid, Ashley Greene and that model who got naked in a Robin Thicke video.

Pics: Wenn.com