Carole Baskin’s Late Husband’s Family Aired A PSA About His Disappearance During The Socially Distanced “Dancing With The Stars” Premiere
Alex, I’ll take “Headlines That Wouldn’t Have Made Any Goddamn Sense A Year Ago” for $1000.
Last night was the 29th season premiere of Dancing With The Stars. The show featured AJ McLean, Skai Jackson, Nelly, Johnny Weir, Anne Heche, Charles Oakley, Jeannie Mai, Jesse Metcalfe, Vernon Davis, Nev Schulman, Chrishelle Stause, Kaitlyn Bristowe, Monica from Cheer, Justina Machado, and, of course,
that bitch wildlife conservationist Carole Baskin! A beaming Carole performed a paso double with partner Pasha Pashkov to (ugh) Eye Of The Tiger. The duo received the lowest score of the night. RIGGED!
The Cast Of The 29th Season Of “Dancing With The Stars” Has Been Announced, And Yes, Carole Baskin Is In It
Dancing With The Stars officially announced the cast of its 29th season on Good Morning America today. We already heard that tiger savior and possible husband murderer Carole Baskin and Anne Heche were going to risk breaking their bones for a check, and joining them and the rest of the cast will be Nev Schulman of MTV’s Catfish and Jesse Metcalf, the big-tittied gardener from Desperate Housewives.
The new season starts on September 14th and if the promos are any indication this cast reveal doesn’t even matter because this show is going to be all about new host and executive producer, Tyra Banks. Well, we’ve known for quite some time that much like the Borg, Tyra likes to insert herself places and take the fuck over.
The new season of Dancing with the Stars will start on September 14, so it’s about that time to start hearing about who may do the social distance salsa for a check. We already know that Tyra Banks is the new host and executive producer after both Tom Bergeron and Erin Andrews were told to do the GTFO shuffle out the door. Sources are now talking to E! News about the casting of the 29th season (!!!) and there are a few potential “stars” including accused husband murderer Carole Baskin who got famous from Netflix’s Tiger King docu-series. You know Joe Exotic is fuming from prison because he wanted to be the one to shake his ass in sequins for money and camera time. But hopefully, Carole uses the opportunity to bury the hatchet with Cardi B by performing a waltz to WAP.
Dancing With The Stars just got ten thousand percent more extra because they’ve got a new host in the form of Tyra Banks. So after contestants do a socially distanced Cha-Cha in an empty studio, they should expect to have to listen to Tyra, appearing via Zoom, go on and on about the time when SHE was on Dancing With The Stars even though she’s never been on Dancing With The Stars. Because Tyra will bring her tomfoolery and shenanigans to DWTS as she replaces the recently-axed Tom Bergeron.
Exactly one week ago, it was reported that Hilaria and Alec Baldwin had lost their fifth child, and now we’re learning that James Van Der Beek and his wife Kimberly are no longer expecting their sixth.
Pour one out for Sean Spicer as the lying former mouthpiece for the President of the United States has finally been eliminated from Dancing With The Stars. Poor guy, but lucky for him that he’s got Karamo Brown to give him a best friend shoulder to cry on.