I hope you appreciated the flicker of light that was the return of Shawn Mendes and Camila Cabello. The pop-star
contract couple lovers tested a re-up of their contract reunited last month after breaking up in November 2021 after two-ish years of publicly making out everywhere they were legally allowed–including television. But it seems that their reunion did not garner the media attention they desired–I MEAN–it didn’t relight that spark of true love between them because Shawn and Camila are reportedly calling it quits once again.
People reports that on Monday, Kevin Costner’s wife, Christine Baumgartner, filed to legally quit his ass after nearly 19 years of marriage. Kevin’s rep released a statement about their split, and it seems like he wants the divorce to happen as much as all of us want a sequel to Waterworld. His rep made it clear that the divorce is not his choice. But you know, in Hollywood marriage time, 18 years is practically forever, especially since Kevin and Christine’s marriage kicked off with allegations of him sexually harassing a massage therapist during their honeymoon in Scotland.
Taylor Swift has already repeatedly come for the Easter Bunny’s job by dropping all her “Easter Eggs” in her songs, videos, posts, and pretty much everything else she does. And now, Taylor has completely stolen the spotlight from the Easter Bunny during his big co-headlining weekend with Jesus! Because Entertainment Tonight was the first to report yesterday that the Easter Bunny’s nemesis and her boyfriend of six years, Joe Alwyn, broke up a few weeks ago, and it was “amicable.” People co-signs ET’s news that Toe is over. Well, while some of us leave relationships with nothing but a heart full of regrets and a crotch full of crabs, Joe is leaving his relationship with the damn Grammy he won thanks to Taylor. That’s a parting gift almost better than Derek Jeter’s Derek Jeter-themed one-night-stand gift basket.
Emily Ratajkowski Is Reportedly Splitting From Her Husband Sebastian Bear-McClard Over His Cheating Ways
After being married for about four and a half years, model-slash-actress-slash-author Emily Ratajkowski and her husband, millionaire movie producer-slash-one time housing scammer Sebastian Bear-McClard, are reportedly calling it quits. They haven’t officially announced anything yet. But an anonymous source has been talking to Page Six, and they claim that Emily wants out asap, because Sebastian allegedly can’t stop putting his McCock in women who aren’t his wife.
Cupids everywhere are taking to their LinkedIn accounts today to update their profiles to let everyone know that their job as a “true love influencer” is over after a zillion years in the game and it’s all because of the fact that Lauren Graham and Peter Krause have split up. Lauren and Peter were together for over 10 years, and while they mostly kept things on the shush, her rep has popped up to announce that they broke up last year.
Johnny Knoxville has said that he’s done with doing crazy dangerous shit so Jackass Forever and Jackass 4.5, which were released in February and May, will be your last chance to see him endanger his life and get brain damage. Luckily there are still tons of people online who will lick toilets, play with plugs, or any other number of insanely stupid shit that will make you go: “…Why?” But if Johnny thinks he’s done with dangerous activities, he clearly isn’t aware that divorce is a full-contact sport, because he’s filed for divorce from his second wife, Naomi Nelson, after twelve years of marriage.