Andre’s Cold Duck sparkling wine!

Because I have a fully developed wine palate that only tingles for the world’s finest Champagnes, Andre was already HSOTD on New Year’s Eve in 2008. But now let’s pay tribute to Andre’s brand of Cold Duck, which is always the most elegant bottle in a drugstore booze aisle!

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Diane von Fürstenberg (70)
Gabby Douglas (21)
Bob Bryar (37)
Psy (39)
Donald Trump Jr. (39)
Joey McIntyre (44)
Gong Li (51)
Michael McDonald (52)
Scott Ian (53)
Nicholas Sparks (55)
Val Kilmer (57)
Bebe Neuwirth (58)
James Remar (63)
Tom Hamilton (65)
Rita Lee (69)
Tim Matheson (69)
Taylor Hackford (72)
Sir Ben Kingsley (73)
Sir Anthony Hopkins (79)
John Denver (1943-1997)
Donna Summer (1948-2012)

Pic: Pinterest

Cutting her good snorting finger in a boating accident helped Lindsay Lohan understand the suffering of Syrian refugees. Well, it’s official, I guess whatever was left of LiLo’s brain was in the finger that got sliced up – The Superficial

Marky Mark spent his holidays like a Real Housewife: sipping on ro-zay in an ugly pink swimsuit on a yacht in the Caribbean – Lainey Gossip

Adele may have gotten married on the down low during Christmastimes  – Celebitchy

Countess Luann de Lesseps is going to marry that bald ball of sleaze on New Year’s Eve and I’m sure Bethenny Frankel is going to get her a very useful wedding gift (read: a divorce lawyer’s card) – Reality Tea

Like most famous tricks on this planet this week, Kate Bosworth is in a bikini – Drunken Stepfather

These LOVE Advent videos are never ever going to stop coming – The Nip Slip

Our reigning Queen of THOTs posed in her chonies again, because the world will stop turning if she doesn’t – Popoholic

And just like that, Charlie Sheen has ordered ALL the Alexas – Hollywood Tuna

My brain would shart up a thousand WTFs over what Sofia Vergara is wearing but it’s too busy sharting up a thousand WTFs over Joe ManJello wearing a shirt in Bora Bora – Popsugar

Ashley Greene announced her engagement with a cheesy video that’s more embarrassing than Twilight – IDLYITW

GARGOYLES! SLYCICS! DOARK-SIDED! Azealia Banks is getting attention today for Snapchatting a video of her showing off the bruja closet where she has allegedly sacrificed chickens. Well, if she’s a renter, there goes her deposit – Just Jared

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The Mannequin Challenge was a thing that happened 9,789,998 light years ago (in internet time, anyway) and we’ve all moved on to the newest challenge of the moment, the Fire Challenge, which involves trying to not throw yourself into a giant fire after reading all of the depressing news of 2016. But in these astronauts’ defense, they’re all the way in space, so they’re probably on a 2-month delay when it comes to finding out about the latest stunt that people are pulling for likes.

European Space Agency astronaut Thomas Pesquet tweeted a video yesterday of the crew aboard the International Space Station doing the Mannequin Challenge on their day off. You know, if I was an astronaut in space, I’d be spending my day off trying to figure out how I can get to Mars and live off of human caca potatoes (pootatoes) like Matt Damon so that I wouldn’t have to return to the bloody cum dingle that is earth. (Although, I’d end up returning anyway because they don’t have In-N-Out in space and Grindr doesn’t work up there.) But these astronauts decided to spend their day off stealthily holding onto stuff while freezing their bodies in microgravity.

We got the whole crew together and took the #MannequinChallenge to new heights #Proxima pic.twitter.com/vlOglQ3lEh

— Thomas Pesquet (@Thom_astro) December 29, 2016

Yes, that’s impressive, but they didn’t come close to beating Boston the Boxer at the game he’ll own forever. So they had to stay still in microgravity? Big deal! Boston had to stay still while trying to hide his judgement about the weird shit that humans do to pass the time.

Well, you know what they say: ask and ye shall receive. Drake and Jennifer Lopez finally did something. It’s beyond corny and will make you question how desperate is too desperate, but it’s something! UsWeekly says that Drake and Jennifer Lopez attended a winter wonderland-themed “prom” in Los Angeles last night. A prom that I’m sure wasn’t thrown together hastily at the last minute with discount decorations from Dollar Tree and located in an empty banquet hall located beside the office of one of their publicists. Nope, that’s definitely not what this is.

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My dad cracks me up when he tries to search for things on his cell phone. In the loudest voice possible he says “OK, GOOGLE!”. Then proceeds to fumble with the phone for the next ten minutes once the shit doesn’t work for him. I’m assuming these are the same types of antics Tina Knowles experiences with new technology.

E! News reports that mama Tina has come under fire for liking a negative comment aimed at her daughter Beyonce’s Dreamgirls co-star, Jennifer Hudson.

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