Bitch Should Listen to Strangers

/ October 22, 2006

Lindsay Blohan tells next month’s InStyle Magazine that she can’t stand when people she doesn’t know give her advice on her life. She would must rather get advice from her crackpot mother.

She said, “The other day this guy I’d never met was like: ‘Make sure you keep your stuff together.’

“I was like: ‘Excuse me? You know nothing about me.’ I was flabbergasted.”

Truth hurts.

Blohan is currently in Paris, because French coke is better. Actually, she looks good and much healthier. Let’s hope it stays that way.



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Marie Antoinette – Snaggletooth in a Powdered Wig

/ October 22, 2006

I unfortunately went to see Marie Antoinette last night. Yes, I want to fuck Kiki Dunst with her own snaggletooth, but I buy into hype. My $10 went down the drain. I basically could’ve gotten the same images from a Meat Loaf video. It was all style, no substance.

Many critics agreed with my dumb ass and here are some hot quotes. I love bad reviews:

” Without daddy’s money…Coppola’s emaciated screenplay would still be moldering on her hard drive as the author worked the 10-4 shift at the Starbucks on Figueroa.”Film Threat

“As for Dunst, there’s nothing she does here that couldn’t have been done by Jessica Simpson.” Deseret News

So if you want to see this trash, make sure you get drunk and bring some weed. Which will probably get you arrested, but at least you’ll have a much more exciting experience than staying and watching this bore.

That being said, Jamie Donran is in it and he’s the hotness.


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Hot Slut of the Week: Helen Mirren

/ October 22, 2006

Birthday: July 26, 1945
Birth Name: Ilyena Vasilievna Mironov

Original Date of Hot Slut of the Day: October 16, 2006
Claim to Fame: Excalibur!

Where is she now? Bitch is currently starring in “The Queen” and will win an Oscar for that hotness. Trust.
Why is she Hot Slut of the Week? She has hot tits and still manages to be a sex kitten at 61.

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Parasite Hilton to Torture the People of India!

/ October 22, 2006

Thank God that only cows are sacred in India and not whores! Parasite Hilton is set to put the people of India through more turmoil by visiting them next year. This piece of trash has already tapped into the Japanese market by probably tapping their businessmen and now she wants to bring it over to India. Parasite’s designer and friend, Anand Jon, who plans to come with her ass, said,

“I am planning to bring a line of high-end evening wear to India by next year. And who could be better than Paris — the ultimate ‘It’ girl — to present my designs?”

More like the ultimate “shit” girl and that’s the truth.

Mr. Anand must have been high on her twat fumes when he said this, “She is a style diva. She is very particular about what she wears. She is the Madonna of our generation.”

To make matters worse, Paris graces the cover of French Vogue next month. Jesus, what the hell is this world coming to? Mass suicide is looking rather lovely right now. I’ll get my Nikes. You bring the Kool-Aid.


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Blind Item…I Guess…You Guess…

/ October 22, 2006

This is a long one! It comes from Digital Spy:

A celebrity adopted a child from the same African orphanage as Madonna – but gave the youngster back two months later. Home of Hope director Rev Thomson Chipeta, who refused to name the star, is now concerned that the children he cares for will suffer because of the backlash following Madonna’s decision to adopt Malawi orphan David Banda. “We had a phone call from supporters in the UK on Monday asking what was going on,” he told the News of the World. “I am concerned the reaction may harm the work we are doing. A lot of children are going to suffer because of this. Who knows why they picked David Banda from all the other children? “Another very famous person took a child from us for adoption and brought it back a few months later.” Martin Lowdon, who runs the Malawi Orphan Fund, added: “We regret the fact that there has been so much publicity about one orphan when there are still large numbers of orphans in need of welfare provision.”

I have no effin clue! They don’t give us shit. I’m going to take a gamble and say Tara Reid, because bitch realized she couldn’t afford it!

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