Morning Vomit

/ October 23, 2006

Here’s the latest video from Meth-Face aka Fergie. The song is a straight-up redo of JJ Fad’sSupersonic“, but I can still feel it a little. The video is nothing that we haven’t seen before and seeing her ass in a bed of candy makes me never want to touch a Mars bar again. Ok, I’m lying..I’m eating one right now.

Furthermore, everytime she says “all the boys want to eat it” I want to eat my own eyeballs out.


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“I’m Just Gonna Borrow This African Orphan for a Couple of Days”

/ October 23, 2006

The father of David Banda aka Madonna’s latest purchase, is very confused about the whole adoption thing. Yohana Banda didn’t realize that she was taking his son for good; he thought the woman was just borrowing him. You know like one would borrow a cup of sugar.

He said, “Our understanding was that they would educate and take care of our son just as they were doing at the orphanage. I am just realizing now the meaning of adoption.”

This is a completely different statement he made last week. When human rights groups were pissed that Madge was adopting an African boy, he responded, “As David’s father I have no problem (with the adoption), so what is their concern?”

Looks like his ass is having a change of heart and methinks it’s too late.

“If we were told that she wants to take the baby as her own we could not have consented, because I see no reason why I should give away my son.”

Yohana said that he does not want his son to return to the orphanage, so I guess everything will stay as is. When asked to comment young David said,

“Papa don’t preach, I’m in trouble deep.”

Okay, lame.


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Bitch Should Listen to Strangers

/ October 22, 2006

Lindsay Blohan tells next month’s InStyle Magazine that she can’t stand when people she doesn’t know give her advice on her life. She would must rather get advice from her crackpot mother.

She said, “The other day this guy I’d never met was like: ‘Make sure you keep your stuff together.’

“I was like: ‘Excuse me? You know nothing about me.’ I was flabbergasted.”

Truth hurts.

Blohan is currently in Paris, because French coke is better. Actually, she looks good and much healthier. Let’s hope it stays that way.



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