It’s starting to feel like today’s theme is on-screen couples who turn into real-life couples. First was Peggy and Ed from Fargo possibly getting engaged, and now we’ve got Jesus and Mary Magdalene possibly getting together. Page Six says that Rooney Mara and Joaquin Phoenix found misunderstood moody thespian love with each other on the set of Mary Magdalene. Rooney plays the original hooker with a heart of gold and Joaquin is playing Jesus. It’s like come-to-life Bible fan fiction!
Sources say that 31-year-old Rooney and 42-year-old Joaquin got together some time during filming and have been together ever since. But a rep for Joaquin says he’s just “good friends” with Rooney, and that they happen to work together a lot. They’ve worked together once before on Her, and are scheduled to work on another film together called Don’t Worry, He Won’t Get Far on Foot in 2018.
The timing is a little suspicious. Rooney has dated Charlie McDowell, the son of Malcolm McDowell and Mary Steenburgen, for six years. But Page Six notes that the two of them haven’t been seen in public together since August. Neither of their reps had any comment about that.
Rooney was in Lion, which was nominated for several awards at the Golden Globes last weekend. But she was a no-show for the ceremony. A source claims she was missing from the GGs because she was “holed up in the desert” with Joaquin instead. That sounds like the opposite of sexy. Deserts are dry, and putting the word “hole” that close to the opposite of moist sounds like a bad time for all involved. Not to mention that deserts are also usually hot, and Joaquin’s greasy ass probably doesn’t do so well in the heat.
As you can see above, Selena Gomez and The Weeknd performed together at the 2015 Victoria’s Secret fashion show. Someone must have slipped someone their phone number backstage and that someone must have been hanging onto it until both of them were single. Or to be less dramatic, they might have just reconnected though an Instagram DM. Regardless of how it happened, it looks like Selena Gomez and The Weeknd might be together.
E! News has some pictures of 24-year-old Selena and 26-year-old The Weeknd hugging and kissing outside of a restaurant in Santa Monica last night. A source says that they were inside for three hours and that they “came out and were so happy.” It looks like The Weeknd is trying to not let a post-dinner belch escape into Selena’s mouth.
— E! News (@enews) January 11, 2017
This love connection is a teeny-tiny bit scandalous to the 13-year-olds who are crying about it on Twitter. The Weeknd used to date Bella Hadid, who is the sister of Gigi Hadid, who used to be friends with Selena (or at least took a trip to Dubai with her). If Gigi is the sort of person who thinks it’s tacky to date her sister’s leftovers, then Selena’s situation with The Weeknd might make things weird at Taylor Swift’s next squad meet-up.
Still, I think this is good news for Selena. Making out with a new famous dude in public is one of the final steps in the Justin Bieber Dickmatization Recovery Program. This is also good news for The Weeknd. The last girl he dated was comatose in the eyes. I’m sure he appreciates being with someone who doesn’t require him to wave his hand in front of her face and ask “Helloooo? You still there?” every half hour.
Less than two months after she announced to the world (aka her Instagram followers) that she was climbing the muscled parts of the appropriately-named UFC fighter Luke Rockhold, TMZ says they’re over. But don’t cry for Demi. She’s reportedly already made the transition to another hard-bodied rassler.
Evan Rachel Wood called it quits with her husband Jamie Bell back in 2014, and if I knew anything about the two of them was that they loved to dress like an ironic husband and wife Arcade Fire cover band. I wondered if Evan would ever find someone to join her in hipster band cosplay ever again. Turns out she has. And that person is her fellow real-life band member.
Evan is in an electro-pop duo called Rebel and a Basketcase (yes, named after The Breakfast Club) with a guy named Zach Villa. UsWeekly says they’ve been making more than just pretentious music. They were seen kissing at a party after the Critics’ Choice Awards. Last week they were seen holding hands while walking through an airport in Montreal. Okay, but to be fair, holding hands might not be confirmation that they’re doing it. They might have been holding hands to make sure that neither of them wandered off and got lost in the airport after catching a whiff of delicious poutine.
Evan Rachel Wood hasn’t said if she’s dating V for Villa. But do we really need that? Here are some pictures of ERW and her man at the Los Angeles premiere of Into The Forest back in June. Choosing to show up to an event all matchy-matchy tells us this is way beyond casual thing. Kristen Stewart is looking at these pictures and giving them both a round of apathetic applause for Evan and Zach’s hipster couple commitment. “Matching bleached hair swoops? AND on the same side too? Bravo (sniffles back tears) bravo.”
It’s been seven years since Nancy Meyers made It’s Complicated. As someone who is a big fan of watching well-off people in their sixties wearing a variety of casual sweaters get their grove back, this story will hold me over until a sequel.
Page Six says that four-time divorcees Christie Brinkley and David Foster were seen on a date Wednesday night at Ralph Lauren’s Polo Bar in NYC. They later went to a jazz club and were seen “looking cozy.” I need to know if they looked cozy because they were both wearing off-white turtleneck sweaters. It’s critical to me believing in the Nancy Meyers-ness of it all. The source says that at one point, Christie was pulled on stage and played drums with the band. Oh my god, this is a movie! I bet it’s called Uptown Woman.
Christie and David reportedly met at the Apollo in the Hamptons benefit, the one Casper Smart stupidly bailed on this summer.
I really want Christie Brinkley and David Foster take this all the way to a wedding, if only because I would love to see what would happen after their inevitable divorce. Christie showed us this summer that she could be just as messy as any real housewife when she blasted a rock-pisser outside her house in the Hamptons with hose water. I like to picture that Christie and Yolanda would call up Linda Thompson and convince her to join them in a reality show called The Former Mrs. Davids Club. Oh shit, I’m mixing up my middle-aged women movies, aren’t I?
Tobey Maguire and Jennifer Meyer called it quits on their 9-year marriage almost two months ago and one would naturally assume that his triumphant return to the Pussy Posse would last the better part of a year. (I believe the re-initiation process requires at least 6,969 hours of supervised model-banging.) However, it looks like Tobey could possibly be more interested in dating right now.
A source tells Radar that Tobey might be dating Demi Moore. In a very weird turn of events for a Pussy Posse member, Demi Moore is 13 years older than Tobey.
Demi and Tobey were rumored to be dating way back in 2002 before she got with Ashton Kutcher and he got married. The source tells Radar that Demi reached out to Tobey after the news of his split from Jennifer, and that “it didn’t take long for things to heat up.” The source claims Demi and Tobey’s conversation was innocent enough at first, but then she started reminiscing about “the good times” and it snowballed from there.
“Demi is still a sexy, attractive woman, and Tobey is just her type — younger, smart and kind of goofy. She’d like more than a hookup. She’s very lonely these days and looking for someone to share her life with. Who knows where this will go?”
Neither Demi nor Tobey have confirmed they’re doing anything with each other, so this could literally just be some fanfic created by a bored intern at Radar. I like to believe it’s real. Sure, the Pussy Posse handbook states that all boners should be aimed at 20-year-old bikini models, but Demi counts. Some parts of her are in their 20s and she may not technically be a bikini model, but that doesn’t mean she’s not a pro at taking bikini selfies.