Category: Engaged
50-Year-Old Dane Cook Is Engaged To His 23-Year-Old Girlfriend Of 5 Years
It’s time for everybody’s favorite subject: math! If Dane Cook is 50, and he just proposed to his girlfriend of 5 years, 23-year-old Kelsi Taylor, has this relationship always been legal? Hmmm… multiply by 6, divide by 6, subtract 5, carry the 1… OK, the answer is technically YES, but it’s still categorically icky. Nevertheless, snide congratulations are in order.
Beanie Feldstein Got Engaged
Beanie Feldstein is engaged! The current star of the Broadway revival of Funny Girl took to Instagram to announce that she said “I do, Bon” to girlfriend Bonnie Chance Roberts’ proposal and share pics of the couple’s happy day. If you look reeeally closely at each photo, you can Where’s Waldo a tiny, blurry Lea Michele creepily watching from the shadows, Phantom of the Opera-styles. “Soon,” she hisses. “Soon.”
Princess Märtha Of Norway Got Engaged To Her Celebrity Spiritual Hacker Boyfriend
Princess Märtha Louise of Norway is engaged to her longtime boyfriend, celebrity healer, “risen-from-the-dead spiritual guide,” self-professed sixth-generation shaman, third-generation psychic, and “spiritual hacker” Durek Verrett, aka Shaman Durek. These two went public with their love back in 2019, and have hosted controversial spiritual seminars using the title “The Princess and the Shaman” (Vanity Fair used the same title for their 2020 interview with the couple). To say Norwegians aren’t impressed with their princess’ choice of man is an understatement; polls show 92% of the country believe Shaman Durek is a charlatan. They compare him to Rasputin. The couple blames the criticism on racism. Either way, Norwegians better change their tune, cuz if enough people die, Shaman Durek could be their future king!
Keanu Reeves And Alexandra Grant Might Be Engaged
OK! Magazine is reporting that Keanu Reeves and his girlfriend of four years, artist Alexandra Grant, are engaged. According to a very invested source, Keanu “tried to keep a low profile” on March 31, when he was spotted in L.A. “eyeing diamond rings” at a jewelry store. The insider claims that 57-year-old Keanu asked 49-year-old Alexandra to marry him after they spent an extended period of time together in Europe, where he was shooting back-to-back movies, including John Wick 4. Ahhh, nothing more romantic than playing a tortured killer hell-bent on revenge.
Colton Underwood Doesn’t Want To Sign A Prenup With His Fiancé
Last week former football player/virgin Bachelor disaster Colton Underwood announced his engagement to political strategist Jordan C. Brown. The two haven’t been dating a particularly long time; 30-year-old Colton only came out as gay last spring, and he and Jordan, 39, went Instagram-official at the end of 2021. But true love has no timeline. It also doesn’t have a prenup. Yep, the couple has no interest in signing a prenuptial agreement, because Colton says they’re “in it for the long haul.” Awww, that’s the kind of blind Christian optimism that inspires a closeted gay man to sign on to The Bachelor!
46-Year-Old Casey Affleck And His 23-Year-Old Girlfriend Caylee Cowan Might Be Engaged
Casey Affleck may be engaged to his girlfriend of a few months, actress Caylee Cowan. Last week the couple were papped at a Lakers game and on Sunday they were spotted leaving a restaurant in Beverly Hills. Both nights Caylee was wearing a sparkly rock on her ring finger. Neither has confirmed the news, but a ring plus pap attention usually equals engaged. Speaking of math, Casey is 46, and Caylee is 23. Yep, exactly half his age. At least until March 19, when she turns 24. Then she’ll be practically half his age, which just isn’t as dramatic. So get your digs in now. Continue reading