Category: Christmas Shit

Open Post: Hosted By A Kentucky Woman Calling 911 About Her Neighbor’s “Cousin Eddie” Yard Mannequin

December 24, 2022 / Posted by:

Some Kentuckians have taken issue with innocuous things like books, style, and Hilary Duff. Apparently, fun and holiday whimsy are on the chopping block as well; because when one Kentucky house was dedicated to the Griswold Family Christmas in a unique way, a neighbor was so disturbed by a man in a robe “exposing himself” that she called 9-1-1 to report the perp. But as it turns out, it was just a mannequin displayed as National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation’s Cousin Eddie enjoying a yard beer while emptying his shitter.

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Open Post: Hosted By The Arizona Driver Who Got A Ticket For Trying To Drive In The Carpool Lane With An Inflatable Grinch Passenger

December 16, 2022 / Posted by:

‘Tis the point of the holiday season where people start losing their gat damn minds as they race around town trying to track down the best sale on prime rib or get their hands on that ridiculous “Little Live Pets Mama Surprise Guinea Pig” that will be the only thing to shut their kid up on Christmas morning. So it’s unremarkable that people sometimes try to cut corners where they can when it comes to the holiday hustle and bustle. But one Arizona driver decided to break the rules, but ~make it festive~ when they cruised the carpool lane with an inflatable Grinch as their sole passenger. They got busted, though, and ended up with a ticket and a feature on The Arizona Department of Public Safety’s Twitter.

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Open Post: Hosted By Camila Cabello Making Fun Of Herself For How She Pronounces “Christmas”

November 23, 2022 / Posted by:

I guess all that making out with Shawn Mendes in front of the paparazzi really did a number on Camila Cabello‘s tongue dexterity because when she covered I’ll Be Home For Christmas last year, people were a bit confused by how she was pronouncing the holiday’s name as though she’s a toddler with a burnt tongue who just had dental surgery. Not one to shy from attention, Camila leaned in and poked fun at her own inability to say Christmas, getting over 2 million likes on TikTok.

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Open Post: Hosted By The First Photos Of Lindsay Lohan’s Netflix Christmas Movie

October 4, 2022 / Posted by:

Lindsay Lohan is returning to the big screen (well, only if your TV is huge). Last year, Lilo shot a Netflix movie called Falling for Christmas. It’s a Hallmark-esque holiday flick co-starring Chord Overstreet. Yesterday was October 3, aka Mean Girls Day (it’s the day Aaron Samuels asks Cady what day it was), and marketing guru Lindsay celebrated by posting the Falling for Christmas poster to her Instagram. She captioned it, “it’s October 3rd. now mark your calendars for November 10th.” Netflix also dropped a bunch of stills from the film. Get in losers, we’re going to watch 36-year-old Lilo make her millionth comeback (this time in gigantic sleeves puffier than her lips!)!

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Open Post: Hosted By The Naked Santa Run

December 15, 2021 / Posted by:

UPI says that over the weekend, more than 40 runners braved the cold to participate in the 18th annual Naked Santa Run, in Budapest, Hungary. Now, I know you’re closely examining the header pic for sugar plums and nutcrackers, but, unfortunately, the Naked Santa Run doesn’t feature any actual nudity. It’s mostly just sexy lil’ outfits, bathing suits, and the odd Speedo. But everybody, no exceptions, must wear a Santa hat on their head. On their head head, you sickos!

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Open Post: Hosted By New Hampshire’s Reindeer Burglar

December 2, 2021 / Posted by:

New Hampshirites! Please be on the lookout for a suspect wanted in a break-and-enter at an elementary school in Barnstead. Suspect is a male reindeer with one antler; the other antler was left at the scene of the crime. Suspect broke in through a window at noon on Sunday (thank God the kids weren’t there) and escaped through a second window before he could be captured by cops and firefighters. The Barnstead Police Department alleges that one of their officers heard a voice in the distance yell, “On Dancer!”, but I’m gonna chalk that up to typical cop bullshit. Continue reading

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