Category: BREAKING NEWS
Wendy Williams Claims It Was Not A Fart And She Doesn’t Even Fart That Much Because She’s A Burper
Wendy Williams has cleared her life of her cheating husband and is officially divorced and moving forward, and now she is clearing the next issue hanging over her head: Fartgate 2. Yes, we were calling Wendy a free-farter after she seemed to let one rip during her show last week. Well she’s here to tell you that she is not a farter, has never been a farter, and will never be a farter–because she is what? A big-burping queen! Yes, Wendy claims that she is so busy passing gas through other orifices so she doesn’t even fart that much.
NeNe Leakes Got Pissed At Andy Cohen For Making Fun Of Her For Wearing The Same Dress Twice
NeNe Leakes of Real Housewives of Atlanta let it be known that she is not going to take any shady comments from anyone, including her boss Andy Cohen. NeNe took to Instagram to call Andy #messy and #pointless for making a joke about a dress, which she wore twice (once during a confessional and once during a doorbell show where the strap broke). Okay, but if NeNe is really going to “come for” Andy she might want to come up with better hashtags than pointless and messy. Andy’s made a whole Housewives universe that is built on being pointless and messy. No one’s watching the Housewives while thinking, “Gee I wonder what point they’ll make today and I hope no one’s messy.” No. So NeNe better come up with more biting remarks if she’s really going to hurt Andy Cohen, because she basically just complimented him!
Woman Does Karate, Son Gets Naked, And Her Dog Steals Cornbread In Walmart (Not In Florida!)
Sometimes you just want to do some karate chops, get naked wasted and eat some cornbread that your dog stole. Well, apparently to a certain store (WALMART!!), in a certain state (Wisconsin) you are not allowed to just LIVE your best Wisconsin Walmart life. In fact, if you do these things, your ass is getting arrested. At least that’s what happened to 46-year-old Lisa Smith and her 25-year-old son Benny Vann.
Breaking News: Virgin Bachelor Thinks Period Panties Are Gross
For a man who I’m sure has spent the better part of his life being called Colton Underwear, TV’s The Bachelor Colton Underwear (ok, Underwood) doesn’t know very much about his namesake. Colton recently appeared on a show called LadyGang (it’s not nearly as cool as it sounds, they do NOT have matching satin jackets) and received the shock of his life when he learned that women generally don’t throw their panties out every time they get their period. Upon hearing about period panties, Colton showed his ass by screaming “that is so gross!” and inadvertently let every one know he shits his pants on the regular by comparing the two. Apparently this has pissed some people off, but why are they surprised? His name is COLTON UNDERWOOD.
The Biggest Moment In American Political History Has Happened: Taylor Swift Endorsed A Candidate
When the internet nearly exploded into a zillion megabytes last night over the news that Taylor Swift has finally gotten political, the Democratic Donkey and the Republican Elephant probably clenched their assholes an extra kind of tight in anticipation over what side she’d take. As pop stars like Katy Perry, Lady Gaga, and Beyonce made it Windex-clear (although, Windex does leave streaks, don’t come at me Windexheads) that they were with Her during the 2016 U.S. presidential election, Taylor stayed pretty much quiet and was accused of only caring about one party: the Party of Taylor Swift’s MONAY! And when Taylor was hailed by the alt-right as their queen, she didn’t publicly denounce their asses and instead went after a writer who wrote about it. But because things have become an even bigger flaming turd, Taylor has broken her political silence and endorsed a Democrat.
Peta Murgatroyd Talked About Maksim Chmerkovski’s Armpit Stank, Or Lack Thereof
Peta Murgatroyd–one of those professional twirlers from Dancing With The Stars–did a long-ass interview for Health and it is long. So that you don’t have to read through the whole thing and bore yourself with how effortless this dancing blonde girl’s life is, I did for you. And here is the highlight: her husband, fellow dancer Maksim Chmerkovski, doesn’t use soap.