Emotive genius Kristen Stewart has a new movie coming out called Personal Shopper. In it, her character (the personal shopper for a supermodel) might be receiving text messages from her dead twin brother. Hey, it’s not a remake or based on a comic book, so that’s something.

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Are other continents and countries that are treading on firmer dignity territory this week looking over at #murica and thinking “wow, they used to be so dignified?” Probably. Two players in this week’s Trump-centric political scandal (I refuse to type “Grab-Gate.” Again.) have released statements about Donald Trump’s latest pile of ew.

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Nice & Wild! 

Nice & Wild were the Milli Vanilli of their time! They were an 80s Eurodance group from America who brought many thing to their performances, like pucker-inducing glamour, charisma, and intrigue (because many tricks in the audience were like, “The fuck is going on?”). But one major thing they didn’t bring to their performances is live singing, because yodeling out raw musical notes is just not something any of them did. The group was made up of David Torres, Reggie Pierre and Remy Palacios, and Wikipedia says that they Britney Spears’d to vocals done by John Minnis. David Torres apparently did sing the Spanish parts after taking singing lessons. But who cares if they really couldn’t sing! They made up for it with style and yes, looking like the cast members of an intergalactic production of Wizard of Oz designed by Grace Jones IS true style.

Nice & Wild put out one album in the 80s, 1987’s Energy, Love and Unity, and they had one major hit with 1986’s FL grade musical gem Diamond Girl. They put out a few other songs in the 80s, but Diamond Girl was always the crown jewel of their musical legacy. Behold, Nice & Wild’s impeccably coordinated dance moves and Drag Race-winning lip synching skills!

Nice & Wild was gone way too soon, because the world could always use a trio of gay space pirate-looking lip-synchers.

Pic: Apple

Scott Bakula (62)
Bella Hadid (20)
Jodelle Ferland (22)
Scotty McCreery (23)
Tyler James Williams (24)
Spencer Grammer (33)
Colin Donnell (34)
Zachery Ty Bryan (35)
Chris O’Dowd (37)
Brandon Routh (37)
Randy Spelling (38)
Nicky Byrne (38)
Nick Swardson (40)
Sean Lennon (41)
Steve Burns (43)
Jason Butler Harner (46)
PJ Harvey (47)
Steve McQueen, the director (47)
Pete Docter (48)
David Cameron (50)
Guillermo Del Toro (52)
John O’Hurley (62)
Tony Shalhoub (63)
Sharon Osbourne (64)
Jackson Browne (68)
Nona Hendryx (72)
John Lennon (1940-1980)

Pic: Paramount

“Canada’s Least Wanted” Justin Bieber IS that come-to-life spymaster of our time. The irritating shithead took to the Amsterdam streets sporting Joanne the Scammer’s version of Kris Jenner’s Sunday afternoon wig and a fake goatee. I’m not sure the disguise was necessary, Biebs. I’m not seeing the general public having exited the weed bakery to wait outside your hotel to envelop you on the streets out of sheer lust for your powerful celebrity presence. There’s one guy that thinks it might be you but that Jillian Michaels podcast he’s listening to you is infinitely more interesting.

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King of his own asshole inner-space Kanye West put on a New York Fashion Week show back in September whose primary goals seemed to be giving his models heatstroke and spiral fractures in their ankles. Kanye, having received a collective boo from the fashion press (and probably Amnesty International), reportedly fired his entire staff after “The Atrocity Exhibition on Roosevelt Island.”

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