Category: Stop! Thief!
Jeremy Piven’s House Was Robbed Of $20,000 Worth Of Clothes
Jeremy Piven has been the victim of a CRIME! TMZ is reporting that Bling Ring-esque thieves broke into Jeremy’s LA home when he was out of town. They came in through a smashed window and made away with $20,000 worth of clothes. Now, if Jeremy were a regular poor like you and I, this would be a huge loss. But, luckily, this is the guy who used to charge $15,000 for a Cameo Zoom call. Ipso facto, he’s rich. And $20k worth of rich-person-clothes is likely just a distressed pair of jeans and a Johnny Depp-style fedora.
Beyoncé’s Storage Unit Was Robbed Of $1 Million Worth Of Designer Stuff
Somebody reached into the back of one of Beyoncé‘s closets and pulled out her Freakum Dress and made the fuck off with it, because TMZ says that storage units rented by her production company, Parkwood Entertainment, were robbed of tons of designer stuff. The worth? $1 million. Yes, ONLY, $1 million. “Hmm, I see they did me a favor by snatching up the cheap rags I was planning to donate to Goodwill,” said Beyoncé since she’s probably got more than $1 million worth of coins in her sofa cushions.
A Judge Has Dismissed Johnny Depp’s Request To Have Amber Heard’s Counter-Suit Dismissed
Back in September, Amber Heard filed a $100 million counter-suit to the lawsuit Johnny Depp had filed against her. Johnny is suing Amber for $50 million, accusing her of making up domestic abuse claims as a hoax to garner sympathy and ruin his reputation. Amber’s counter-suit accused Johnny of plotting to smear her name online, allegedly using numerous bots and anonymous social media profiles to talk shit about her and try to get her fired from upcoming projects. Johnny was hoping to have Amber’s counter-suit left behind in 2020, but a judge has turned down his request.
Open Post: Hosted By The Porch Pirate Whose Getaway Was Thwarted By A Snow Bank
A couple of days ago a sneaky porch pirate hit a neighborhood in Mississauga (outside of Toronto), in the hopes of pilfering some poor unprotected packages off suburban doorsteps. Unfortunately for the thief, he was immediately caught red-handed and on camera by one of the homeowners. The guy runs back to his car, calling, “Sorry, sorry!” (this is Canada after all), and tries to make a quick getaway. But that bitch karma works fast, cuz he reverses his little hatchback directly into a pile of snow. And then he’s stuck.
Dr. Dre Is Recovering In The Hospital After Suffering A Brain Aneurysm
Dr. Dre is currently in the hospital, and no, it’s not to deal with a chronic shoulder muscle injury he sustained while dramatically whipping the prenup his estranged wife Nicole Young claimed he tore up. It’s because Dr. Dre suffered a brain aneurysm on Monday night, and was rushed to a hospital in Los Angeles. The good news for Dr. Dre is that his diagnosis looks good, and he’s recovering. The bad news is, while he was in the hospital, his house almost got robbed. And even when he finally gets discharged from his hospital room, his brain won’t get much of a rest. Because he still has to deal with the never-ending headache that is his ongoing messy divorce.
Jeffree Star Claims He Was Robbed By His Now Ex-Boyfriend Andre Marhold
Multi-millionaire beauty YouTuber, Jeffree Star, has claimed to have been robbed. But this wasn’t some makeup warehouse heist which would end with thousands of eyeshadow palettes on the internet for cheap. Jeffree claims that he was robbed by, Andre Marhold, a basketball player type who was totally dating Jeffree for his personality and heart and NOT for his money. And Jeffree totally wasn’t “dating” Andre to make people think his racist ways are a thing of the past. But now the love between Jeffree and Andre seems to be over. So not only has Jeffree taken a hit by allegedly getting robbed, but the definition of true love has taken a hit now that Jeffree and Andre are over.