One of the hardest punches to the soul in 2015, for me, was finding out that my tweenhood idol Brenda Walsh had to take on the smegma-covered demon that is cancer. Shannen Doherty was diagnosed with breast cancer in 2015, and she shanked, slapped, kicked, throat-punched, and elbow’d that ugly piece of trash until it screamed for its mommy and joined The Don’t Fuck With Brenda Walsh Club (Kelly Taylor is president). Shannen delivered some good news in 2017 by announcing that the cancer had gone into remission. But because 2020 has to keep showing past years that it can be even worse by saying, “Hold my beer cup of human fetus blood which fuels the evil in me even more,” Shannen says that the cancer came back. And it’s stage 4.
Fox has decided that the six episodes of BH90210 were more than enough. The reboot which had already been rebooted is dead once more. But knowing how these things go, it won’t be for long. Give it two to four years for a reboot of this reboot.
The Hollywood Reporter claims to know what everyone on BH90210 are getting paid. The good news for poor little rich girl turned poor girl Tori Spelling is that she’s one of them. Shhh – don’t tell her numerous creditors.
Variety says that multiple sources claim the showrunner and several writers of the 90210 reboot called BH90210 just up and quit. And it happened on Tori Spelling’s birthday. It’s a mess, which is saying something, considering the idea of a 90210 reboot/revival/mockumentary thing already sounds pretty messy.
When the 90s tween inside all of us shriveled up into a puddle of sadness after crying out a billion tears over the death of Luke Perry, celebrities who knew him and celebrities who didn’t know him (including Colin Hanks with his story of Luke saving a flight from wild brats!) shared their thoughts and condolences for him, but the one that I kept waiting to her from was his forever onscreen soulmate Shannen Doherty. I refreshed Shannen’s Twitter and Instagram pages so many times that after the one millionth refresh, I got a restraining order from her Twitter and Instagram pages in my inbox. The night before Luke went off to heaven to have a smolder-off with James Dean, Shannen was at a charity event and asked for payers before calling him “her Dylan.” Shannen has now spoken about the way-too-early loss of Luke Perry.
Late last year, news about yet another Beverly Hills, 90210 reboot/revival/whatever was burped up when Jennie Garth, Tori Spelling, Ian Ziering, Jason Priestley, and Brian Austin Green were papped getting coffee in between laughably pitching to networks. I say “laughably,” because I can only imagine how raw the vocal cords of network executives got as they laughed uncontrollably while Jennie and company seriously pitched a 90210 reboot without The Forever Queen of 90210 that is Brenda Walsh. 90210 without Brenda Walsh is like broccoli without mayonnaise. It’s boring, bland, and nobody wants it. And like broccoli with mayonnaise, if you don’t like Brenda Walsh, you obviously have no taste and don’t know what you’re talking about!
But I guess FOX needed a tax write-off, because they bought the 90210 reboot that will be 100% Brenda-less.